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Reclaiming our Family Honor!

Reclaiming and regaining our family honor…that was stolen from us!

Taking back what Joan M Wheeler stole from our family!

ॐ शान्तिः शान्तिः शान्तिः ॐ
om shanti shanti shanti om

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UPDATE OCTOBER 2016

I’m updating with links to my second blog and a Facebook page wherein I expose AGAIN the lies, fabrications and hate that Joan M Wheeler (Doris Michol Sippel) says about me and family. The first book ‘Forbidden Family, A Half Orphan’s Account of Her Adoption, Reunion and Social Activism‘ was pulled from publication by the publisher in May 2011. Then in 2015, she ‘self-published’ a ‘revised’ version calling it ‘Forbidden Family, an adoptee duped by adoption’. This woman has no shame no sense of family honor! Then in 2016 Joan changed her name back to her birth name and rewrote and republished the SAME crap in another book; a Third edition! CALLED ‘Forbidden Family: An Adopted Woman’s Struggle for Identity’! Talk about conning people!

https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/

this blog’s title/sub title is… DUPED BY ADOPTION & AN WOMAN’S STRUGGLE FOR IDENTITY, A BOOK STUDY an in-depth analyzes of the books called Forbidden Family; My Life as an Adoptee Duped by adoption & An Adopted Woman’s Struggle for Identity by Joan M Wheeler/Doris M Sippel.

https://www.facebook.com/dupedbyadoptionStruggleforIdentity1/

UPDATE Sept 2015 my new blog…

Duped by adoption, a book study An in-depth analyzes of the book Forbidden Family My Life as an Adoptee Duped by Adoption.

https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/

and a new Facebook page

https://www.facebook.com/dupedbyadoption1

THE FOLLOWING LINK IS IMPORTANT TO SEE JUST HOW SNEAKING AND DANGEROUS JOAN IS…

https://gertmcqueen.wordpress.com/2012/08/14/it-boggles-the-mindjoan-wheeler-hates-her-blood-family-yet-uses-the-dead-members-of-the-birth-family-and-another-dead-person-to-hide-behind-and-attack-the-living-birth-members/

UPDATE July 2015 added an LinkedIn account with a post

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/heres-what-i-am-all-gert-mcqueen

UPDATE March 2015 this post sums up the TRUE story of our family versus the ‘point of view’ of Joan Wheeler.

https://gertmcqueen.wordpress.com/2015/03/02/joanwheeler-has-a-new-business-is-asking-for-submissions-heres-mine-flipthescript/

Update November 2014

The purpose of this blog is about exposing all the wrongs that Joan Wheeler has done to me and my family and telling the truth of myself and my family.

It would be wise to look at the ABOUT page to get updates that I have removed from this front page. It bears repeating…the sole purpose of this blog is about the behavior of Joan Wheeler.

Our commentary and reporting is our business.

The lying, hate filled book, called Forbidden Family, by Joan Wheeler is now dead. We told the truth and the publisher pulled the book because of its libelous contents. Joan Wheeler refuses to remove all of her blogs with that title and her hate words towards us.

This blog is to help reclaim OUR Family away from Joan Wheeler…she is the Forbidden One…she was NOT conceived in 1954, when this family picture was taken and can not claim this picture. She was adopted out of the family and when ‘reunited’ turned her hate and anger against us.

Yep, the worst thing Joan Wheeler ever did was to publish that lying book. Now she will have to live with that dead book tied around her neck until we set everything in it straight and right and it starts to stink and rot OR she decides to make it right and remove ALL references to Forbidden Family on her two web sites and apology to us siblings and our parents!
Warning…the contents of this blog are not suitable for young impressible minds or for people who believe everything Joan Wheeler has said or written. Believe her at your own risk! She is a user of people!
see joint post of Gert and Ruth
update of February 2014…Joan has still NOT answered any of our charges against her…in fact when asked directly she runs and hides away, or screams that we are harassing her…so we shall continue on until she answers to the dirty deeds and words she has said and deeds she has done. Joan still has NOT removed her hate blogs against us or gotten her friends to get rid of theirs, so we shall just carry on. Everything Joan and her friends have done to the birth family are part of the historical record.
 NEW COMMENTS JAN 3, 2016

HI there! I had the unfortunate experience of reading Joan Wheeler’s book (it was free on Kindle and in my interest area). I’m adopted, and have recently extricated myself from a disastrous reunion forced on me by my birth family. All that said…Joan Wheeler is a self-pitying narcissist. I feel bad for you and your family. You reached out to her in what seems to be hope and love only to have the door repeatedly slammed on your hand…then she blames you for ruining her door jam! Her writing in this book is wheedling and ‘oh they don’t make me the center of my universe so I’ll make them!’ in tone. You and your family are in my prayers that she either wises up or just stops out of boredom.

Edit

  • Jan 3, 2016…I’m replying to the about comment of same date

    Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us who are named in that latest garbage book of Joan M Wheeler. Glad to know that you didn’t have to pay $$ for it! I did pay for the Kindle but for the printed edition, with discounts, I paid .76 cents…yes seventy-six cents! This book, just like the first one, will never be any kind of ‘best-seller’ for she is speaking to a very small ‘crowd’ that think like herself. There are many out there, like yourself who ‘see’ behind what she writes.

    I’m glad that you KNOW about narcissistic behaviors for they can cause tremendous difficulties for anyone who gets ‘close’ to them. I’d encourage everyone to learn more about those types of behaviors for self-protection. Unfortunately, Joan will never ‘wise up’ nor ‘stop’ for any reason, because she is a narcissistic that NEEDS constant attention and she hates adoption.

    Sorry to hear that you have had a ‘disastrous reunion’; reunions are NOT easy for anyone and when they go horribly wrong, no one wins. Keep in mind that generally all families can be ‘messy’, doesn’t matter whether one is adopted or not, and if you can maintain proper boundaries, those messes won’t get too bad. Your life is your life, live it as you see fit to live it!

    Thank you for keeping us in your prayers, as we will you.

     

    I made a new blog post on my “REFUTING A BOOK OF LIES: FORBIDDEN FAMILY BY JOAN M. WHEELER by Joan M. Wheeler – exposing her lies”
    https://ruthsippelpace.wordpress.com/2016/01/03/2016-a-new-year-and-im-back-to-blog-about-joan-mary-wheelers-lies-in-her-forbidden-family-trashbook/

     

Joan M Wheeler/Doris M Sippel says ‘comments from my adopted family made me realize just how twisted they really were’

OKAY, just because a family ‘adopts’ doesn’t make them twisted! Just because family members have different opinions and views doesn’t make them twisted! Adoption is not an evil. Some people can be and are evil! It is always people that make things bad, ugly or evil…NOT a concept or institution.

OBVIOUSLY Joan/Doris is twisted; by her hate and anger!

Adoption DOESN’T mean the same thing to EVERYONE! That is just what the problem Joan/Doris has with being adopted! She CAN’T get everyone to see it FROM HER VIEW POINT. Regardless of what Joan or others want, to eliminate adoption from the world, that will NEVER happen!

Okay…looking at it ‘from’ her point of view, she MAY HAVE gotten a rotten adoptive family, who were very insensitive. But, knowing Joan as I do, Joan, herself, is very insensitive and is quite rotten in her own right and dishes it out like the best of them! Joan/Doris is not an angel.

Joan’s birth family, the same that I come from, is not all THAT SENSITIVE to certain topics, opinions and members within our family. Is any family FREE from insensitive members? I doubt it! FAMILY IS MESSY! NO family is free from negative people or thoughts. Adoption is not the cause of NEGATIVE PEOPLE OR THOUGHTS; PEOPLE ARE.

Of course, I and others, can and do see the hurtful things that others say about and to adoptees but you know…adoptees are NOT the only ‘type’ of people that have ever gotten negative/hurtful statement thrown at them! These ‘sensitive’ adoptees need to grow some thicker skin and get on with their lives!

After our mother died and our first step-mother was hospitalized, I and my other siblings were placed in orphan and foster homes! We were all subjected to similar statements and taunts. I could rant and rave over all the horrible mean-spirited negative put-downs that I heard over my lifetime, about being an orphan, a ward of the state, etc etc, but what would that accomplish? NOTHING! I have learned HOW to be a better person BECAUSE of having to live with those taunts! I’ve learned that HUMAN NATURE is one that I can NOT change; I can only change MYSELF.

Joan/Doris ought to put on sack-cloth and ashes and do more self-flagellations so she may feel more alive for she certainly can’t find ONE THING pleasant in life to talk about! She is over 60 NOW…and it’s high time that she learns that the only thing she has CONTROL over and CAN CHANGE, is HERSELF. If she is unwilling to do that she ought to shut the fuck up!

Found on an adoptee Facebook page

Martha Shideler‘s post.
November 4 at 8:00am

I realized, as a result of this election year, how important negative people and people who disagree with me have been in my life. As an adoptee who wanted to find my birth family from the time I was a small child, I was beset by negativity. In fact the only person who supported me in my need to know was my adoptive mother! Everyone else was critical, negative, downright insulting. I was told such things as, “She didn’t want you then, she doesn’t want you now.” “You have no right to search.” “If it were a good thing for you to know, it wouldn’t be against the law.” “You think you come from royalty when you actually were just the product of some slut who didn’t want you.” “You are an ungrateful brat who doesn’t appreciate how good a family you have.” “Why don’t you show your adoptive parents you love them instead of trying to hurt them.” At first I was devastated by these comments and believed I truly was a horrible child to have these thoughts and feelings. And then, as I got older, I critically examined every one of those comments (which continued even after I had grown up and left home), and discovered they were either downright lies or the twisted attempts of sick people to control what I thought, felt, did. And, as a result, every one of those comments helped me clarify my purpose, and strengthen my resolve. If it weren’t for them, I might never have had the persistence to actually find my birth families.  November 5, 2016

 

Doris Michol Sippel Exactly. For me, those comments from my adopted family made me realize just how twisted they really were. They didn’t love me, they loved the thought of adoption itself. This was extended family.  November 5 at 4:38pm

End of exchange

 

BUT NOW let’s just take a closer look at what Martha said…

And, as a result, every one of those comments helped me clarify my purpose, and strengthen my resolve.

 

Why is IT that Joan/Doris doesn’t and can’t do the same thing! Because Joan can’t let go of her hate and anger…that is the only thing that keeps her alive! Joan was FOUND, by the birth family, and that (being found) is what set Joan’s adoptive family off! Joan BLAMES the birth siblings, for setting in motions, events for those negative people/comments to be said by her adoptive family members!

Joan/Doris really does need to LET IT GO

Now to remind people…the history of Joan’s books (plural) of her hate and anger against both the birth and adoptive families.

The first book Forbidden Family, A Half Orphan’s Account of Her Adoption, Reunion and Social Activism‘ published in 2009, was pulled from publication by the publisher in May 2011 due to libelous material in it. Then in 2015, she ‘self-published’ a ‘revised’ version calling it ‘Forbidden Family, an adoptee duped by adoption’, being her own editor and owner. This woman has no shame no sense of family honor! Then in 2016 Joan changed her name back to her birth name and reedited and republished the SAME crap in another book; a Third edition! CALLED ‘Forbidden Family: An Adopted Woman’s Struggle for Identity’! Talk about conning people!

See my blogs and Facebook page

https://gertmcqueen.wordpress.com/

https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/     this blog’s title/sub title is… DUPED BY ADOPTION & AN WOMAN’S STRUGGLE FOR IDENTITY, A BOOK STUDY an in-depth analyzes of the books called Forbidden Family; My Life as an Adoptee Duped by adoption & An Adopted Woman’s Struggle for Identity by Joan M Wheeler/Doris M Sippel.

https://www.facebook.com/dupedbyadoptionStruggleforIdentity1/

 

End

 

Doris M Sippel/Joan M Wheeler doesn’t care about ethics! She just exposes & exploits two families with her hate!

ethics in writing memoirs…

duped by adoption & an woman's Struggle for Identity, a book study

Are there ethics when writing a ‘memoir’? How does someone exam their own reasons for exposing ‘all’ and how do they know their reasons are sound? What do the experts say?

I’ve read many authors and writing experts on tips for writing, in general and memoirs in particular and for the most part they all present solid reasons and tips. Many memoir writers don’t care about what the experts say, or anyone for that matter, because they are only interested in continuing on with their own HATE agendas.

Seen on Twitter…

Linda Joy Myers Ph.D ‏@MemoirGuru  24 Dec 2016

When you put real people in your memoir, even if the portraits are positive, it’s good form to notify them. http://bit.ly/2dGEsnl  #memoir

^^^^

So I clicked on the link provided and got an error message.

http://namw.org/2010/08/secrets-and-tips-write-a-powerful-memoir/

But the post can be seen on these following links

http://namw.org/blog/

http://namw.org/author/linda/page/91/

Here now is…

View original post 1,388 more words

Don’t take that bone, of contention, away from mad-dog Joan M Wheeler/Doris M Sippel! (3 of 6)

When Joan/Doris sets her sights on a pro-adoption person she just can’t let them and it alone! I’ve written about several comments left by Joan on this site…

http://ouradopt.com/adoption-blog/jan-2009/lisas/ready-set-sign

Unfortunately is that site is no longer available.

Here are the links to part one and two of this series of six

https://gertmcqueen.wordpress.com/2017/02/01/browbeating-and-insults-abound-as-joan-m-wheelerdoris-m-sippel-is-unable-to-control-herself-1-of-6/

https://gertmcqueen.wordpress.com/2017/02/23/dangerous-combination-for-adoptees-when-joan-m-wheelerdoris-m-sippel-believes-her-own-bs-as-she-slanderslibels-others-2-of-6/

SEE END OF THIS POST FOR UPDATED INFORMATION

So well, here is another of her rampages, under her name half-orphan. (all spellings within her comments are hers) My comments will begin with Gert says.

my rights to my birth record are my civil rights

Submitted by half-orphan on Mon, 01/05/2009 – 13:33.

Hi Anneadoptee, Hi also to Marjorie,

One would think that it would be easier to request and receive our sealed records after even one week or one day being reunited, but for some reason, our lives are treated by The Gate Keepers as if we are poison.

Gert says… First here’s a definition of gatekeeper;

A gatekeeper is a human who controls access to something, for example via a city gate. In the late 20th century the term came into metaphorical use, referring to individuals who decide whether a given message will be distributed by a mass medium.

So obviously she believes that adoptees are victims of society’s ‘ignorance’ of the adoptees’ plight. Nice touch there, saying that adoptees are ‘poison’. Yep, Joan is great with adjectives!

half-orphan says..

In 1985, 9 years after reunion, I petitioned Surrogate’s Court of Erie County, New York, for my adoption papers. The guy with the control, opened up the records, partially. At that point, he said, and he wasn’t a judge, I was “entitled” only to the Final Order of Adoption. I, being the grateful little adoptee, sat there as this jerk read all of the other papers…glancing through, he spotted my adoptive father’s name and said, “good man, he must be proud to have you as his adopted daughter.” yeah, I felt like sying, “Yeah, he WAS, he’s only been dead now for 3 years,” but I didn’t say anything. As if, my adoptive father’s pride meant anything at all. It didn’t. I was there as an adult of 29 years. The transaction had nothing to do with a minor child asking permission from any parent, NO, I was there acting on my own behalf!

Gert says…

Yes, her mocking ways are a bit difficult to grasp, you have to read it more than once to finally get through all her sarcasm! She hates anyone ‘in or with control’ because that means that she is ‘their’ victim! So…’the guy with the control’…’who wasn’t a judge’…told her she’s ‘entitled’ ONLY to…

Joan has no conception that the ‘worker-bees’ are just DOING their jobs according to the rules governing their job/position.

In that libelous book, she tells about how she ‘tracked’ down the parish priest who signed the ‘false’ baptismal certificate BUT he was in a nursing home dying so she left him to ‘meet his maker’! Kid you NOT! Just like the guy she mentions here, he and the priest, are just worker-bees and YET they are subjected to Joan’s berating, insulting and condemnations!

This phrase, ‘the grateful little adoptee’, is a form of torture in Joan’s mind as well as in other adoptees. Well the GREATESS gift anyone can give to themselves is to say THANK YOU. But, to certain types of personalities, like Joan, they are NOT thankful of HAVING a life! They hate their life and therefore will never be happy.

Note how she dismissed the adoptive father’s role in HER life! The man was lucky to have died early, at least he was spared the wrath of Joan’s hate into his nineties as the adoptive mother endured!

half-orphan says..

Look you people! The way Americans view adoptees is pathetic! We are not trash, nor are we possessions, nor are we splitting loyalties if we seek our birth and adoption records. We are humans and deserve to be treated with respect due US. We are not slaves, indentured servants, nor are we members of one family only. Adoptees have two sets of real parents. That means, respect given to our ancestors, including our parents who gave us life, and respect given to our adoptive parents. BUT, when do these two sets of parents give US respect? We are told by “protectors” of the rights of “unwed mothers” that we must respect their privacy, but no one says that our parents must respect us.

Gert says…

The great and wonderful Joan has commanded the ‘people’s attention’! She WANTS respect, but doesn’t give anyone else RESPECT. Why does she think adoptees are slaves and indentured servants? Of course there are bad people doing bad things to other people, happens all the time, but to equate adoption with these qualifications LIMITS good things about adoption and puts it into the garbage dump. To Joan and those like her, adoption is an evil! They see the rest of the world through that lens! Joan wants what she denies others!

half-orphan says..

There is Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, but no Children’s Respect Day, or, better yet, how about Adoptees’ Respect Day?

Gert says…

How about lobbying Hallmark Cards or the United States Congress? Only they can make that happen.

half-orphan says..

Indigenous peoples the world over have deep respect for ancestors, for they are the ones who propegated the planet. Who we are today is a direct result of biological inheritance: what we look like and our unique body chemistry is inherited. That tie is sacred. For those of you who think that natural parents need protection from the very offspring they created and released into the world, think again! And be grateful for the parents YOU have, because, if you (john) had to face any or all of the injustices we adoptees have to face, you’d crumble from the stress and strain, the psychological torture, and the physical trap. Look into the mirror and be glad (John and all who want to defend “hiding” “birthmothers” that you can look into the mirror and know from where you get your eyes, your nose, and that immune system that has just given you an autoimmune disease requireing extensive medical care.

Gert says…

While I agree that there are some ‘good’ arguments for open records and release of medical information the way Joan goes about ‘informing’ people actually puts them OFF. And when she singles someone out, in this case ‘John’, she is making her statement PERSONAL; that is ALWAYS a receipt for not being heard! Never make it, your social cause, personal! Joan has no training in people skills or sensitivity of other’s feelings. Here it is obvious that Joan is attacking John because he is defending the other, which Joan hates! Joan and her opinions are what matters, only! Also note how in her anger she misspells and forgets capitalizations.

half-orphan says..

Us poor slobs known as adoptees (even after reunion because our bllod kin is afraid to give us informationon their medical issues due to HIPPA laws)have to tell doctors that “I’m adopted” and therefore, cannot possibly give you extensive, multi-level and cross-level charts of who-has-what. No, our parents, all of them, owe US respect and courtesy and honor.

Gert says…

Gee!! She can’t even have nice words to say about herself and fellow adoptees! Joan got her medical information FROM the birth family, yet she STILL denies what it says. Why? Because she has a story-line and the TRUTH, of the medical information, does not fit her story line! Again, she wants respect, courtesy and honor from the birth family! The very things she DENIES the birth family and others who adopt or who are pro-adoption! Two-faced, forked tongue idiot!

half-orphan says..

We have to go through life battling the whims and opinions of others, who think they have the right to open there mouths and spill out, “I think that adoptees should…” or, “Well, my friend adopted a girl from China and…” Who the f… cares? NO one gives plumbers or carpenters or auto mechanics their opinions right from the start of every conversation on how to do their jobs! Why does the general public think we give a damn about their opinions on our state of life? Do these opinions do anything at all? NO.

Gert says…

Why does she ‘battle’ so? Because that’s all she knows how to do! She has never learned that the whims and opinions of others do NOT define one’s self! She has no inner peace because she is full of hate. She can NOT accept the life that she has! And, as she continues spitting her hate out, she continues to spin out and out of control! HER opinions do nothing at all? Her opinions DO NOT change others’ opinions. And that is what and why she continues to do BATTLE. She NEEDS to stop browbeating people because she doesn’t agree with their opinions! She NEEDS to stop TELLING pro-adoption people WHAT THEY SHOULD BE THINKING AND DOING.

half-orphan says..

The only ones to actually do anything about prejudice against adoptees are other adoptees (and natural parents) who understand the deeper levels of prejudice. There are many ignorant adoptees who claim that the only parents they have are the ones who raised them, well, for these opinion-makers, I feel so much insulted by them. They try to inflict their denial onto me, and other adoptees.

Gert says…

Joan is mixing several ‘themes’ here together, no wonder people can’t understand her. She is allowing her inner tormentS out in a mixed bag of confusion. She is ‘insulted’ by other adoptees who obviously DON’T believe as she does! Poor thing! She hates this ‘other type of adoptee’ perhaps more for INFLICTING their denial onto her! What a fucked up mess Joan is! Joan believes that adoptees that accept their ‘condition’ of adoption and their adoptive parents as being IGNORANT.

half-orphan says..

Every adoptee has two sets of real parents! Everyone on the planet needs to accept that fact of life for adoptees. Accept that, and then we can proceed to the next step: give adoptees back our civil rights to the documents of our births and adoption. The general public need not have access to these records, but we, the victims of closed, sealed adoption, do need access to our own records.

Gert says…

Here we hear Joan’s authoritative pronouncement; everyone on the planet MUST accept what Joan says and THEN we can proceed to the next step! Holy Shit! Shaking in my boots.

half-orphan says..

Thanks for Reading this, and yes, in time, I’ll check into other’s websites and blogs…got a lot of reading to do!

Gert says…

How does she know that anyone reads her ranting? The only things she reads is about adoption and she wants the entire planet to read the same as she does.

half-orphan says..

John, open your mind to the experiences of adoptees who know more of life as adoptees than you do, or that your adopted children know at this point. Don’t shove your beliefs and opinions at us adoptees. Mind your own business, stay out of mine. I’m fighting for my rights to my records — you keep your mits off of my rights! Deal? Deal. I’m not butting in to your role as an adoptive father because I have two young adult children of my own. I’m not butting into the lives of natural parents, either. My rights to my records are no one’s business but my own. And yes, that means names of natural parents on birth certifcates, big deal. That is a government regulation— to register the birth of every citizen. Who ever gets named as parents on a birth record are true facts of reality that cannot be changed. Deal with it!

Gert says…

Demands made to ‘John’ or anyone… to open your mind to the experiences will just fall on deaf ears! What a fool! What she demands here is just what she REFUSES others! She shoves her beliefs and opinions on others, she doesn’t mind her own business and she sure as hell doesn’t keep her mits off others rights! She VIOLATED my parental rights and those of my minor children! Self-righteousness ran amoke!

half-orphan says..

You have your birth certificate and no one is telling you that you can’t have your birth certificate! But, rest assured, as the adoptive father of 5 boys, your name is on 5 fake birth certifcates! GREAAT! That’s 5 times fraud, dishonesty, intentional lying, theft of identity of your adopted boys who have squashed legal rights to their true birth certifcates. Shame on you and shame on the government that allows this fraud to continue!

Gert says…

Joan loves to shame people! Must have happened to her a lot in her childhood!

half-orphan says..

Adoptive parents: beware! You do not have the ethical right to put your names on a fake birth certificate. That’s a sin against nature, and your adoptive daughters and sons. The lies you hang onto will come back and bit you when your adoptees realize how they’ve been duped, duped like in a Bernie Madoff Ponzi Scheme: Made off with adopttees’ identity.

Gert says…

Warning! Warning! Danger! Danger! Joan Wheeler/Doris Sippel is after you!

She has no concept of her own sins and how they ARE biting her as she wrote this and since she wrote that libelous book! She hasn’t learnt a thing. Whats a ‘ponzi scheme’ have to do with adoption and birth certificates?

update information

I’m updating with links to my second blog and a Facebook page wherein I expose AGAIN the lies, fabrications and hate that Joan M Wheeler (Doris Michol Sippel) says about me and family. The first book Forbidden Family, A Half Orphan’s Account of Her Adoption, Reunion and Social Activism‘ was published in 2009 but then was pulled from publication by the publisher in May 2011, for libelous material within the book. Then in 2015, she ‘self-published’ a ‘revised’ version calling it ‘Forbidden Family, an adoptee duped by adoption’. This woman has no shame no sense of family honor! Then in 2016 Joan changed her name back to her birth name and rewrote and republished the SAME crap in another book; a Third edition! CALLED ‘Forbidden Family: An Adopted Woman’s Struggle for Identity’! Talk about conning people!

https://gertmcqueen.wordpress.com/   this blog is titled Reclaiming the Sippel-Herr Family Honor

https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/

this blog’s title/sub title is… DUPED BY ADOPTION & AN WOMAN’S STRUGGLE FOR IDENTITY, A BOOK STUDY an in-depth analyzes of the books called Forbidden Family; My Life as an Adoptee Duped by adoption & An Adopted Woman’s Struggle for Identity by Joan M Wheeler/Doris M Sippel.

also see this Facebook page…

https://www.facebook.com/dupedbyadoptionStruggleforIdentity1/

do check us out 

end

Joan M Wheeler DECLARES that she is mentally ill!

revisiting this post…cause it’s so GOOD.

And the reason is ADOPTION! I kid you not! see end of post for update info Now, who in their right mind would declare such a thing as they are mentally ill? Obviously she is NOT in her right mind! …

Source: Joan M Wheeler DECLARES that she is mentally ill!

eight signs of narcissistic behaviors; Joan M Wheeler/Doris M Sippel has them

learn these traits, think about them when you read anything that she writes, it will save you a lot of grief

Source: eight signs of narcissistic behaviors; Joan M Wheeler/Doris M Sippel has them

Dangerous combination for #adoptees when Joan M Wheeler/Doris M Sippel believes her own BS as she slanders/libels others! (2 of 6)

Great damage happens to other people when a person, who is angry and hateful, continues to repeat half-truths and build upon them by creating more and more lies of tension to make a story MORE dramatic. Joan is a person who LOVES to tell about her pain and anguish. As she does this, the truth vanishes as HER view and feelings takes over. The book, Forbidden Family, has been pulled from publication by the publisher, due to libelous content and breach of contract, May 2011 and yet she continues on with two self-published versions. Read on!

BUT before we go any further I want to share

I’m updating with links to my second blog and a Facebook page wherein I expose AGAIN the lies, fabrications and hate that Joan M Wheeler (Doris Michol Sippel) says about me and family. The first book Forbidden Family, A Half Orphan’s Account of Her Adoption, Reunion and Social Activism‘ was published in 2009 but then was pulled from publication by the publisher in May 2011, for libelous material within the book. Then in 2015, she ‘self-published’ a ‘revised’ version calling it ‘Forbidden Family, an adoptee duped by adoption’. This woman has no shame no sense of family honor! Then in 2016 Joan changed her name back to her birth name and rewrote and republished the SAME crap in another book; a Third edition! CALLED ‘Forbidden Family: An Adopted Woman’s Struggle for Identity’! Talk about conning people!

https://gertmcqueen.wordpress.com/   this blog is titled Reclaiming the Sippel-Herr Family Honor

https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/

this blog’s title/sub title is… DUPED BY ADOPTION & AN WOMAN’S STRUGGLE FOR IDENTITY, A BOOK STUDY an in-depth analyzes of the books called Forbidden Family; My Life as an Adoptee Duped by adoption & An Adopted Woman’s Struggle for Identity by Joan M Wheeler/Doris M Sippel.

also see this Facebook page…

https://www.facebook.com/dupedbyadoptionStruggleforIdentity1/

In addition…see the ‘discussion’ forums, on Amazon, for two of the books. The first book has one review and several comments related.

Forbidden Family: My Life as an Adoptee Duped by Adoption forum

https://www.amazon.com/Forbidden-Family-Adoptee-Duped-Adoption/forum/Fx16ZHWP5PQHHCK/-/1/ref=cm_cd_fp_rvt?_encoding=UTF8&asin=B00X520CGW

Joan Mary Wheeler forum 

https://www.amazon.com/gp/forum/cd/forum.html/ref=cm_cd_rvt?ie=UTF8&cdForum=Fx3T0YAD0KXNPP5

review of first book and 4 comments

https://www.amazon.com/Forbidden-Family-Joan-M-Wheeler/dp/1412061547

do check us out and now to continue…

here is the link to part one and three of this series of six

https://gertmcqueen.wordpress.com/2017/02/01/browbeating-and-insults-abound-as-joan-m-wheelerdoris-m-sippel-is-unable-to-control-herself-1-of-6/

https://gertmcqueen.wordpress.com/2017/03/04/dont-take-that-bone-of-contention-away-from-mad-dog-joan-m-wheelerdoris-m-sippel-3-of-6/

Here we shall see two comments by Joan Wheeler (half-orphan) from 2009 BEFORE that libelous book was published. Within these two comments we FIND some ‘core-kernels’ of what she BELIEVES and how she fabricates stories ABOUT members of both the adoptive and birth family, to fit into HER vision of the truth. Much from these comments made it into the final manuscript and was published Nov 2009. This shows how early on and how often she had slander the birth family, creating an image of us to FIT into her story line. We, of the birth family, didn’t find out about any of this, or the book, until December 2009!

My comments will appear after each paragraph of Joan’s comment. These comments come from this web site… http://ouradopt.com/adoption-blog/jan-2009/lisas/ready-set-sign

Unfortunately this site is no longer available

Today’s Lesson on Lifetime Adoption is: Caring for the Elderly

Submitted by half-orphan on Tue, 01/06/2009 – 15:49.

Joan says…John, you must realize that my adoptive parents were the only parents I conciously knew for the first 18 years of my life. The first five years were untold of adoption. Somewhere between 5, 7, 9 or ten, I was told three different stories of why I was adopted. And yes, it was a shock to hear that another woman gave birth to me. The disclosure was done in a cold way, not at all in a loving way. I was left alone to think about it. It left me feeling sad and alone.

Gert says…ok sure I can understand this…parents are flawed people, we are only human. Joan is NOT the only person who had cold parents who may have lied to her! Joan herself was a cold cruel parent to her children…and she wrote slander/libel about her own children! By continuing to expose the flaws of the people who adopted her she violates their privacy as well, painting them the way Joan wants, which most likely is NOT a true picture.

Joan says…A child grows up loving and interacting with the family that raises that child. Love, affection good times, and sorow happened. Many relatives died, funerals, weddings, and graduations and gatherings…church, school, all normal. That does not get whiped out of existance just because of a reunion.

Gert says…again, I get it! same thing from our, the birth family’s view. Upon reunion, everyone in the birth family ’embraced’ Joan, only to be betrayed by her over and over again and then in a fucking book!

Joan says…My adoptive mother is nearing her 94rd birthday. She cannot be left alone as she cannot walk very well. She is dying of a blood cancer, a form of leukemia. She has other medical issues as well. I am her only daughter, so I am her health care proxy. Mom’s only sister is far more sick than Mom is. And her brothers died many years ago. Just a handfull of relatives coem by to help once in a while, but mostly, it is me taking Mom to hospitals.

Gert says…Her adoptive mother died March 2011, our father died January 2011. And that libelous book, Forbidden Family, died May 2011 when it was proven libelous!

Joan says…My natural father had open heart surgery just before Christmas 2003. He recovered, but needs medical care. His 3rd wife, my stepmother, had a stroke a few years ago. For several years, I shared taking care of them with my two step sisters. But within this past year, I had to bow out. Since Dad has other adult children, he has others to help, including my full blood sisters and half brother. But they are not much help, my step sisters do most of the work. I did, too, but now I have to give more to take care of my Mother.

Gert says…Here we SEE Joan’s TRUTH which is a bunch of misrepresentations and lies! Joan NEVER shared taking care of my father and step-mother. All Joan DID was take them to SOME doctor appointments and shopping (where she tried to con them into paying for items Joan wanted but had no money to pay for, by placing them in the cart unknown to the person paying the bill).

Joan did NOT bow out! Dad KICKED HER OUT because Joan wanted my father to PAY for her car repairs, she got nasty and argumentative to Dad and he said ‘he doesn’t need her help’. Joan was still WRITING the book when she wrote this comment…and in the book she has YET another version of the TRUTH of this ‘bowing out’.

What Joan says here IMPLIES lack of care from other siblings. Each sibling either has work obligations or lives far away. Joan DOES NOT work and lived near by and she volunteered to take them to appointments! If you volunteer you has no right to complain!

What Joan doesn’t say…which is a truth she DOESN’T WANT TO ACKNOWLEDGE…is that the step-sister, whom our dad ADOPTED, has the power of attorney and health care proxy and it was she and her sister, that LIVED near my father and his wife, whom made the decisions to TAKE CARE OF THEM. Joan does not know about any contacts I, or other siblings, have had with my father. Joan makes statements, implying, without having any real knowledge of what others are doing and saying.

Joan says…And when my father went in for his surgery, my adoptive Mom was very concerned. She prayed for him and his recovery. We went to visit him. And my step sister helped me learn how to test Mom’s blood when she needed blood sugar tests for a period of time.

Gert says…again what Joan NEGLECTS to say here (which makes things APPEAR as Joan wants them to appear) is that that ‘step-sister’ was also an ADOPTEE, adopted by our father and his wife. Our father placed into ADOPTION one daughter (Joan) because at the time there were no other options and years later he ADOPTS another child! Strange how life works! And this ADOPTIVE sister is a RN obviously qualified to take care of her mother and adoptive father as well as give Joan some info!

Joan says…So, you see, John, while I do have anger and resentment at the way my adoptive parents handled disclosing or not disclosing the truth to me, and at the way I was treated for the past 35 years of reunion and as an activist, I can still be compassionate toward my adoptive mother.

Gert says…another thing that Joan NEGLECTS to state is that it is BECAUSE of the ADOPTIVE mother that Joan has a place to LIVE…today. Joan moved in with the adoptive mother while her children were still MINORS and still lives there, long after the woman has died!

Joan says…I am hateful and bitter at society’s myths and taboos about adoption and all that was put upon me by otehrs. Had I been left alone to deal with my reunion between myself, my siblings, and my two sets of parents, the reunion would have been much smoother.

Gert says… For Joan to continue her bitterness and hatred, against a society’s ‘being’, she keeps herself locked in place unable to move away from her hate, anger and bitterness. Her refusal to accept the way things are done…or her lack of going to the proper channels (lawmakers), is at the root of all her illnesses. Her only outlets, in life, are these comments that she writes, year after year, blog post after blog post. She has no other life except fighting adoption!

I don’t understand what she means…if she was left alone to deal with her reunion. Oh that’s right, her extended adoptive family gave her MUCH grief and troubles, that Joan turned into lies and misrepresentations saying that she was RECEIVING it from the birth siblings!

Joan says…None of this should have happened the way it did.

Gert says…Well that’s just life…it happens the way it happens.

Today’s adoption lesson is on …

Submitted by half-orphan on Tue, 01/06/2009 – 02:10.

the topic of the devastating effects of separating siblings!

Gert says…Joan seems to have a ‘backstory’ that she created about our ‘separation’. This backstory, of Joan’s, is influenced by the many books Joan reads about separation. Joan doesn’t want to accept the fact that we, siblings, were NOT damaged by her adoption and separation. We WERE damaged by the unfortunate SECOND MARRIAGE of our father. And, if Joan STAYED within the family and NOT BEEN ADOPTED, she would have had the same kind of separation we all had. It’s NOT about Joan! But she’ll make about her!

The problem with Joan’s backstory is, is that it’s all false. Joan refuses to accept the truth…which in a nutshell is…

After Mom gave birth, in hospital bed, to her last child (Joan), it was discovered that she was dying of uterine cancer. Our father proposed marriage to another woman; he would be father to her 2 children and she would be mother to his 5 children. Woman agreed but REFUSED the infant (Joan). Some in our mother’s family wanted to adopt her, but our father said, if he could not raised her NO ONE in the family would. And to place that infant into adoption our father had to MAKE HER DEAD LIKE HIS WIFE AND THE INFANT’S MOTHER. He was not pressured into it by church or others, as Joan continues to state he was.

Everything Joan reads in a book, on adoption, she makes her back story fit so she can continue to exploit and malign the birth family.

Joan says…This is for John, and other adoptive parents who need a wake-up call. No baby, no child comes to you “a blank slate.” Each baby is born with memories of mother’s womb… her heartbeat, her voice, and birth brings smells, tastes, sounds, and sight. A baby knows…from inside, a baby can hear voices that are around. Father, siblings, other people. Music. When that baby is taken away, the resulting trauma is deep, and causes lifelong pain.

Gert says…This is another nasty tactic of Joan’s…browbeating and insulting people. ‘Adoptive parents who need a wake-up call’…that is what hate and anger does to a person, makes them go after others who do not think the same…she makes everyone an enemy. She did it to me, my 2nd husband and my minor children when I ADOPTED. She didn’t like my answer to her…butt out…and so she called 2 false child abuse reports against me.

Sure, I can accept that there is trauma and I’m sure others can as well, but, that’s no reason to proclaim that ALL ADOPTIONS MUST BE STOPPED.

Joan says…For me, not only did I feel that loss, but my siblings did, too. Their ages were 9, 8, 6, and 3 when I was born and when Mom died. Those kids were helpless! In our separate ways, we’ve dealt with it all…one even ran away in her early 20s to another country! One sister got pregnant at age 17 to leave home, another was so emotionally distraught that she was hospitalized for several months. Our older brother ran off to join the military. We each did our time with drugs, drink, carelessness…And they held onto the thought that one day, they would find me.

Gert says…NOW here we have some real examples of libel and slander. Joan knows not what she says here. These statements are pure her ‘view and perception’ which are false, slanderous and libel. Okay, yes, upon the DEATH of a mother, each child would feel the separation and loss…but…Joan KNOWS NOT WHAT EACH OF US WENT THROUGH. Joan’s pronouncements of OUR LIVES IS PURE FABRICATIONS, LIES, SLANDER AND LIBEL. Our lives have NOTHING to do with Joan’s adoption! Our lives were NOT AFFECTED by the adoption/loss of Joan from us.

How dare she say, in print, here and in that book, that we were HELPLESS…NO we were NOT! We had a father and extended family until 1958 when father’s second marriage fall apart. That first step-mother had to be hospitalized for mental illness and at that time we were placed into foster and orphan homes! If Joan was with us she TOO would have been placed with us!

Joan’s lies and fabricates WHAT HAPPENED TO US, creating slander and libel. Joan makes everything into a drama! One sibling did NOT ran-away to another country! That was planned and worked at for years by CHOICE by a ‘legal aged’ adult. There also was no sibling who was ‘so emotionally distraught that she was hospitalized’ that is pure make-believe on Joan’s part! I was the one who got MARRIED by CHOICE. I was 18 (legal age) and a high school graduate. I wasn’t running away from home; I was creating a home of my own! Our brother did what many did during the Vietnam War Era! He joined the Marine Corp right after high school, like thousands, before he was DRAFTED; again he was NOT running away from home, but serving his country. My husband didn’t go into the military, he was exempt because we had children.

These fabricated and half truths that Joan continues to speak is WHY the birth family EXPOSES her, her words and deeds, and we shall continue to do so. How DARE she say this…’We each did our time with drugs, drink, carelessness…’ She has NO RIGHT to imply that her siblings did drugs, drink and were careless! OUR LIVES ARE NOT UP FOR HER visions and exploitations. That is slander and libel!

Yes, we DID hold to the ‘thought that one day, they would find me’ but when we did we had NO IDEA what a monster she (Joan) was. Everyone in the birth family regrets EVER CONTACTING HER and having HER IN OUR LIVES.

Joan says…But the reunion didn’t make for fun and joy. Because all that sorrow spilled out into anger. They were mad at me for living and Mom dying. They were jealous that I had two parents and they did not. Oh, the relationships did’t start falling apart for several years, but, my stress, I was the one in the middle…crying all the time, deep depression, fear, and I was the baby. It was clear that I didn’t fit in because they grew up together and I was not with them. They grew to dislike me because I became an adoption activist. The more I wrote in the newpsaper, the more my relatives from both families complained that I should keep my mouth shut. Why? I’m not illegtimate so there’s not SHAME. They can have their family crests, but I can’t have mine.

Gert says…’fun and joy’ hardy, with Joan around there never is any fun and joy! And where does she get this ‘sorrow spilling out’? Just because she is miserable doesn’t mean everyone around her is. Mad at her because mom died and Joan lived!? She sure is full of her self-importance! She had two parents and we did not? We had parents and step-parent and grandparents and other extended family…as SHE did with her adoptive family. None of us were ever jealous of Joan, we RAN AWAY FROM HER.

My own relationship with Joan ended in 1981 when SHE violated my parental rights with my minor children and interferred in my marriage! I had NO CONTACT with her from 1982 to 1992 because of that! At a brief gathering of family in 1992 to the publication of that libelous book of hers, in 2009, I’ve had ONLY 3 OR 4 MINOR CONTACTS with her, that ended up in YET more troubles from her. I couldn’t care in the least that she’s an adoption activist! But I do care about the lies she tells about the birth family!

It’s Joan’s own frustrations that ‘come out’ of her mouth/pen that she assigns to others, but she is wrong when she asserts that we have said those things.

Joan says…I explained my feelings recently to an elderly woman: It’s like being bi-racial: neither side wants you. And she said, “I know. I’m half Asian and half white, no one wants me, either.”

Gert says… ‘neither side wants you’…well when a person acts like Joan does what’s a person suppose to do? Everyone in the birth family gave Joan ample time to come to terms with each of us! It was and still is ONLY Joan who continues to insult family.

end

Doris Michol Sippel aka Joan Mary Wheeler just CAN’T keep her mouth shut about me. She gets shot down on Huffington Post, and brings me into it – even tho I was OUT of it (Jan, 2017).

I have meaning to put up this blog post for a month now. But life keeps getting in the way. Wierd how that works. lol. This is about Joan/Doris browbeating people, as usual, who have a different vi…

Source: Doris Michol Sippel aka Joan Mary Wheeler just CAN’T keep her mouth shut about me. She gets shot down on Huffington Post, and brings me into it – even tho I was OUT of it (Jan, 2017).

Doris Michol Sippel aka Joan Mary Wheeler just CAN’T keep her mouth shut about me. She gets shot down on Huffington Post, and brings me into it – even tho I was OUT of it (Jan, 2017).

I have meaning to put up this blog post for a month now. But life keeps getting in the way. Wierd how that works. lol. This is about Joan/Doris browbeating people, as usual, who have a different vi…

Source: Doris Michol Sippel aka Joan Mary Wheeler just CAN’T keep her mouth shut about me. She gets shot down on Huffington Post, and brings me into it – even tho I was OUT of it (Jan, 2017).

An Adopted Woman’s Struggle for Identity by Fred Tomasello Jr Review #4 on Doris M Sippel’s replay/act 3 of her ‘memoir’!

It’s amazing how some people believe in their own self-importance! An exchange on FB… Fred Tomasello Jr. January 10 at 4:25pm · We just saw “Lion.” Doris Michol Sippel, this movie…

Source: An Adopted Woman’s Struggle for Identity by Fred Tomasello Jr Review #4 on Doris M Sippel’s replay/act 3 of her ‘memoir’!

Adopted Child Syndrome – a way out for 50 year old brats? #flipthescript

a person can find any number of ‘illnesses’ to explain their BS behaviors This particular blog post gets FREQUENT views…must mean that there is a lot of interest in the topic̷…

Source: Adopted Child Syndrome – a way out for 50 year old brats? #flipthescript