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Reclaiming our Family Honor!

Reclaiming and regaining our family honor…that was stolen from us!

Taking back what Joan M Wheeler stole from our family!

ॐ शान्तिः शान्तिः शान्तिः ॐ
om shanti shanti shanti om

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UPDATE OCTOBER 2016

I’m updating with links to my second blog and a Facebook page wherein I expose AGAIN the lies, fabrications and hate that Joan M Wheeler (Doris Michol Sippel) says about me and family. The first book ‘Forbidden Family, A Half Orphan’s Account of Her Adoption, Reunion and Social Activism‘ was pulled from publication by the publisher in May 2011. Then in 2015, she ‘self-published’ a ‘revised’ version calling it ‘Forbidden Family, an adoptee duped by adoption’. This woman has no shame no sense of family honor! Then in 2016 Joan changed her name back to her birth name and rewrote and republished the SAME crap in another book; a Third edition! CALLED ‘Forbidden Family: An Adopted Woman’s Struggle for Identity’! Talk about conning people!

https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/

this blog’s title/sub title is… DUPED BY ADOPTION & AN WOMAN’S STRUGGLE FOR IDENTITY, A BOOK STUDY an in-depth analyzes of the books called Forbidden Family; My Life as an Adoptee Duped by adoption & An Adopted Woman’s Struggle for Identity by Joan M Wheeler/Doris M Sippel.

https://www.facebook.com/dupedbyadoptionStruggleforIdentity1/

UPDATE Sept 2015 my new blog…

Duped by adoption, a book study An in-depth analyzes of the book Forbidden Family My Life as an Adoptee Duped by Adoption.

https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/

and a new Facebook page

https://www.facebook.com/dupedbyadoption1

THE FOLLOWING LINK IS IMPORTANT TO SEE JUST HOW SNEAKING AND DANGEROUS JOAN IS…

https://gertmcqueen.wordpress.com/2012/08/14/it-boggles-the-mindjoan-wheeler-hates-her-blood-family-yet-uses-the-dead-members-of-the-birth-family-and-another-dead-person-to-hide-behind-and-attack-the-living-birth-members/

UPDATE July 2015 added an LinkedIn account with a post

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/heres-what-i-am-all-gert-mcqueen

UPDATE March 2015 this post sums up the TRUE story of our family versus the ‘point of view’ of Joan Wheeler.

https://gertmcqueen.wordpress.com/2015/03/02/joanwheeler-has-a-new-business-is-asking-for-submissions-heres-mine-flipthescript/

Update November 2014

The purpose of this blog is about exposing all the wrongs that Joan Wheeler has done to me and my family and telling the truth of myself and my family.

It would be wise to look at the ABOUT page to get updates that I have removed from this front page. It bears repeating…the sole purpose of this blog is about the behavior of Joan Wheeler.

Our commentary and reporting is our business.

The lying, hate filled book, called Forbidden Family, by Joan Wheeler is now dead. We told the truth and the publisher pulled the book because of its libelous contents. Joan Wheeler refuses to remove all of her blogs with that title and her hate words towards us.

This blog is to help reclaim OUR Family away from Joan Wheeler…she is the Forbidden One…she was NOT conceived in 1954, when this family picture was taken and can not claim this picture. She was adopted out of the family and when ‘reunited’ turned her hate and anger against us.

Yep, the worst thing Joan Wheeler ever did was to publish that lying book. Now she will have to live with that dead book tied around her neck until we set everything in it straight and right and it starts to stink and rot OR she decides to make it right and remove ALL references to Forbidden Family on her two web sites and apology to us siblings and our parents!
Warning…the contents of this blog are not suitable for young impressible minds or for people who believe everything Joan Wheeler has said or written. Believe her at your own risk! She is a user of people!
see joint post of Gert and Ruth
update of February 2014…Joan has still NOT answered any of our charges against her…in fact when asked directly she runs and hides away, or screams that we are harassing her…so we shall continue on until she answers to the dirty deeds and words she has said and deeds she has done. Joan still has NOT removed her hate blogs against us or gotten her friends to get rid of theirs, so we shall just carry on. Everything Joan and her friends have done to the birth family are part of the historical record.
 NEW COMMENTS JAN 3, 2016

HI there! I had the unfortunate experience of reading Joan Wheeler’s book (it was free on Kindle and in my interest area). I’m adopted, and have recently extricated myself from a disastrous reunion forced on me by my birth family. All that said…Joan Wheeler is a self-pitying narcissist. I feel bad for you and your family. You reached out to her in what seems to be hope and love only to have the door repeatedly slammed on your hand…then she blames you for ruining her door jam! Her writing in this book is wheedling and ‘oh they don’t make me the center of my universe so I’ll make them!’ in tone. You and your family are in my prayers that she either wises up or just stops out of boredom.

Edit

  • Jan 3, 2016…I’m replying to the about comment of same date

    Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us who are named in that latest garbage book of Joan M Wheeler. Glad to know that you didn’t have to pay $$ for it! I did pay for the Kindle but for the printed edition, with discounts, I paid .76 cents…yes seventy-six cents! This book, just like the first one, will never be any kind of ‘best-seller’ for she is speaking to a very small ‘crowd’ that think like herself. There are many out there, like yourself who ‘see’ behind what she writes.

    I’m glad that you KNOW about narcissistic behaviors for they can cause tremendous difficulties for anyone who gets ‘close’ to them. I’d encourage everyone to learn more about those types of behaviors for self-protection. Unfortunately, Joan will never ‘wise up’ nor ‘stop’ for any reason, because she is a narcissistic that NEEDS constant attention and she hates adoption.

    Sorry to hear that you have had a ‘disastrous reunion’; reunions are NOT easy for anyone and when they go horribly wrong, no one wins. Keep in mind that generally all families can be ‘messy’, doesn’t matter whether one is adopted or not, and if you can maintain proper boundaries, those messes won’t get too bad. Your life is your life, live it as you see fit to live it!

    Thank you for keeping us in your prayers, as we will you.

     

    I made a new blog post on my “REFUTING A BOOK OF LIES: FORBIDDEN FAMILY BY JOAN M. WHEELER by Joan M. Wheeler – exposing her lies”
    https://ruthsippelpace.wordpress.com/2016/01/03/2016-a-new-year-and-im-back-to-blog-about-joan-mary-wheelers-lies-in-her-forbidden-family-trashbook/

     

Doris Michol Sippel aka Joan Mary Wheeler just CAN’T keep her mouth shut about me. She gets shot down on Huffington Post, and brings me into it – even tho I was OUT of it (Jan, 2017).

I have meaning to put up this blog post for a month now. But life keeps getting in the way. Wierd how that works. lol. This is about Joan/Doris browbeating people, as usual, who have a different vi…

Source: Doris Michol Sippel aka Joan Mary Wheeler just CAN’T keep her mouth shut about me. She gets shot down on Huffington Post, and brings me into it – even tho I was OUT of it (Jan, 2017).

Doris Michol Sippel aka Joan Mary Wheeler just CAN’T keep her mouth shut about me. She gets shot down on Huffington Post, and brings me into it – even tho I was OUT of it (Jan, 2017).

I have meaning to put up this blog post for a month now. But life keeps getting in the way. Wierd how that works. lol. This is about Joan/Doris browbeating people, as usual, who have a different vi…

Source: Doris Michol Sippel aka Joan Mary Wheeler just CAN’T keep her mouth shut about me. She gets shot down on Huffington Post, and brings me into it – even tho I was OUT of it (Jan, 2017).

An Adopted Woman’s Struggle for Identity by Fred Tomasello Jr Review #4 on Doris M Sippel’s replay/act 3 of her ‘memoir’!

It’s amazing how some people believe in their own self-importance! An exchange on FB… Fred Tomasello Jr. January 10 at 4:25pm · We just saw “Lion.” Doris Michol Sippel, this movie…

Source: An Adopted Woman’s Struggle for Identity by Fred Tomasello Jr Review #4 on Doris M Sippel’s replay/act 3 of her ‘memoir’!

Adopted Child Syndrome – a way out for 50 year old brats? #flipthescript

a person can find any number of ‘illnesses’ to explain their BS behaviors This particular blog post gets FREQUENT views…must mean that there is a lot of interest in the topic̷…

Source: Adopted Child Syndrome – a way out for 50 year old brats? #flipthescript

Browbeating and insults abound as Joan M Wheeler/Doris M Sippel is unable to ‘control’ herself! (1 of 6)

Again, we see the great ‘educator for adoption reform’ use her superb talents to win converts…NOT!

Would you stand still (figuratively and physically) and allow Joan/Doris to speak to you in the way she does here? Of course not!

She only gets away with it, sometimes, because of the impersonal nature of the ‘internet’ format. She is far more cowardly, via the phone and in person, where she flees away when another refuses to take her BS! She’s like a viper! Strike and slither away!

BUT before we go any further I want to share

I’m updating with links to my second blog and a Facebook page wherein I expose AGAIN the lies, fabrications and hate that Joan M Wheeler (Doris Michol Sippel) says about me and family. The first book Forbidden Family, A Half Orphan’s Account of Her Adoption, Reunion and Social Activism‘ was published in 2009 but then was pulled from publication by the publisher in May 2011, for libelous material within the book. Then in 2015, she ‘self-published’ a ‘revised’ version calling it ‘Forbidden Family, an adoptee duped by adoption’. This woman has no shame no sense of family honor! Then in 2016 Joan changed her name back to her birth name and rewrote and republished the SAME crap in another book; a Third edition! CALLED ‘Forbidden Family: An Adopted Woman’s Struggle for Identity’! Talk about conning people!

https://gertmcqueen.wordpress.com/   this blog is titled Reclaiming the Sippel-Herr Family Honor

https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/

this blog’s title/sub title is… DUPED BY ADOPTION & AN WOMAN’S STRUGGLE FOR IDENTITY, A BOOK STUDY an in-depth analyzes of the books called Forbidden Family; My Life as an Adoptee Duped by adoption & An Adopted Woman’s Struggle for Identity by Joan M Wheeler/Doris M Sippel.

also see this Facebook page…

https://www.facebook.com/dupedbyadoptionStruggleforIdentity1/

In addition…see the ‘discussion’ forums, on Amazon, for two of the books. The first book has one review and several comments related.

Forbidden Family: My Life as an Adoptee Duped by Adoption forum

https://www.amazon.com/Forbidden-Family-Adoptee-Duped-Adoption/forum/Fx16ZHWP5PQHHCK/-/1/ref=cm_cd_fp_rvt?_encoding=UTF8&asin=B00X520CGW

Joan Mary Wheeler forum 

https://www.amazon.com/gp/forum/cd/forum.html/ref=cm_cd_rvt?ie=UTF8&cdForum=Fx3T0YAD0KXNPP5

review of first book and 4 comments

https://www.amazon.com/Forbidden-Family-Joan-M-Wheeler/dp/1412061547

do check us out and now to continue…

Anyone can see how ‘angry’ Joan Wheeler was in 2009 by the comments she left on various web sites and in print, that year. Over a life-time she has transferred her anger onto the printed page, for her ‘life’s work’. Just before she finished Forbidden Family she wrote a very long, disjointed, perverse and hateful chapter, between April and July 2009, then submitted the entire hate manifesto for publication. Much of her attitude, perversity and more, in the following comment, on the internet, made it into the book. That book was proven to be libelous and was pulled from publication by the publisher, Trafford Publications, in 2011. (see the links above for and about the 2nd book she wrote)

In the comment of Joan’s, that I am presenting, we see (feel) her righteous indignation of all things adopted! For sure I, and others, are NOT blind to some of the issues that are part of adoption reform and are needed in adoption reform! But, myself being a mother who adopted as well as a birth family member, and others of the birth family, we are appalled at the outrageous browbeating and contempt that Joan dishes out to people, all the while as she exploits our PARENTS. That is why we speak out on anything, anywhere, that Joan Wheeler has published.

Before and after the publication of that libelous book the family has SUFFERED greatly from the words and deeds of a clearly mentally ill person! Any one who professes, as Joan does, to be a public advocate, and who states she is a ‘social worker’ (on paper only) their previous words and deeds are ALWAYS subject to scrutiny. Everywhere she’s been on the wide world of the Internet carries her words of hate. This is why I continue to address them, as I find them.

This blot post comes from the following site, but UNFORTUNATELY is no longer available to view

http://ouradopt.com/adoption-blog/jan-2009/lisas/ready-set-sign

This is the first of six blog posts that document the ranting and ravings of Joan on just one web site directed at just one person.

The following browbeating session was before she ‘finished’ writing that libelous book, Forbidden Family. It is obvious that she is consumed by her anger and hate, which of course she put forth in that book. She can not separate herself from her hate and anger; it consumes her. The book was pulled from publication, by the publisher, May 2011.

I have pulled out certain statements of Joan’s (half-orphan) for my own comments; the entirely will follow after my comments.

Submitted by half-orphan on Mon, 01/05/2009 – 01:16.

Joan said… This is my first time in here. Geshh, John! I don’t know where to begin!

Gert’s comment…oh sure she DOES, know where to begin! She searches out for anyone who is pro-adoption in any shape, form or manner. She searches all over the internet, then in 2009, as she did in 2008 and as she does in 2015! She’ll continue to do so the rest of her life! What a waste!

Joan said… Because I really don’t know you, and can only know by the little I’ve read, here’s my take on you and why you have these one-sided views:

Gert’s comment…she doesn’t know the guy but KNOWS he has ‘one-sided views’ and she is going to TELL him all about it! Ego-manic that she is. This is HOW she thinks, and writes, she KNOWS all about the other person…that is why she is so dangerous! She can’t possible KNOW what’s in the mind of another, nor their motives, BUT she writes as if she’s inside the other…that’s called slander and libel and misrepresentation and fantasy.

Joan said…You might be on the defensive because you are in their control now. I’m not really sure what is driving an adoptive parent to defend a natural parent’s perceived right to privacy or confidentiality.

Gert’s comment…’control’? Joan believes that adoptive parents are ‘in control’; apparently her’s were! Most parents are in ‘control’ of their children since it usually takes 20 years, give or take a few years, for a human being to be mature and ‘in control’ of themselves! Of course she can’t ‘understand’ why this adoptive parent is defending a natural parent because she can ONLY understand what HER adoptive parents did or did not do. And being the ‘all wise knowing’ entity that she is…she has already condemned this guy.

Joan said… I speak from 35 years of experience living in a reunion

Gert’s comment…here Joan’s misspeaks and misrepresents the ‘reunion’. Reunion with natural family (knowing them) and ‘living in reunion’ are two very different things! Within 5 years she betrayed me and I kicked her out of my life. Over the years, as each and every birth family member had been betrayed by her, they LEFT her. This includes our father, who finally had ENOUGH of her abuse in 2009, and kicked her out of his home and life! That episode happened mid-2009 and of course Joan wrote about it, from her point of view, and put it in the libelous book! So Joan again, has NO EXPERIENCE.

Joan said…Our father let me go into adoption because: a Catholic preiest suggested that would be best

Gert’s comment…totally WRONG! Sure he would have asked for advise but ultimately our father had no other option but to place her into adoption; his 2nd wife refused to take the infant (Joan). This is a FACT that Joan refuses to accept. She has her ‘story’ and will not accept the truth.

Joan said… telephone reunion, my adoptive mother dumped all of my personal papers on the kitchen table. “You want your papers, here they are! They mean nothing to me any more!” That was the way my loving mother gave me

Gert’s comment…and this is why Joan is so against adoption, because of the negative behavior of the adoptive mother. Once Joan LEARNED about her birth family, she USED that against the adoptive parents, particularly the mother. As a child, Joan learned that same negative behavior, and then USED it on the mother, browbeating her over the issue of ‘you did not give birth to me’ and ‘you lied to me’ all the way to the woman’s death bed in 2011. So much for Joan’s love!

Joan said… I take it John, that you are a non-adoptee. If that is so, you cannot know what it feels like to have your personal, private information stolen from you! That is what adoption does, John!

Gert’s comment…Sure, a non-adoptee won’t. Joan has told her birth family members this all the time, that isn’t the issue! The issue is that Joan is anti-adoption and will do anything to prevent it, including, violating my parental rights with my minor children when I and 2nd husband ADOPTED and violating the rights of others to do what they want in their lifes.

Joan said… that all adoptees would benefit from being adopted with a new name, a new identity, free and clear from the sins of their parents.

Gert’s comment…what the f… ! Well the ‘reunited’ birth family knows, all too well, that Joan’s mind has been in the gutter for sometime! What she does, in these rants of hers, is to ‘shock and awe’ people with these ‘throw out statements’. ‘Sins of their parents’! Sure okay perhaps that ‘was’ the attitude decades ago, but it isn’t anymore…so why does she continue to browbeat people with outdated crap? She could state her position in a more positive manner, but no! This is one reason why she is so ineffective, she never gives any positive feedback or hope.

Joan said… Well, guess what? I’m not an illegitmate bastard, I am a half orphan! There are no special secrets, no shame, no slutty mother, no dirtty old man father, no drug user, no abuser, no neglectful parents: just a 30 year old dead mother, a grieving 31 year old father, and four screaming kids under the age of 9.

Gert’s comment…There are many different types of adoption, but that doesn’t interest her. Joan wants to eliminate adoption. Joan wants to/likes to play the ‘slutty’ angle. Wow! look at her go! slutty, dirty old man, drug user, abuser, neglectful parents and let’s not forget the adjective for those kids…’screaming’! She sure likes to paint a picture! Truth? She’s talking about her OWN children here, not the children that were left after their mother died. How do I know? Because I’m one of them, the oldest, and I can tell you because I WAS THERE, we HAD grandparents and aunts and uncles. We were NOT allowed to scream and carrying on. There was NO back talking with the parent, period. In Joan’s upbringing, she yelled at her adoptive parents! It was witnessed by Ruth how Joan argued with the mother at the sick bed of the father in the hospital! Joan yelled and screamed at her children all the time. Joan wrote about that in the book! This is how Joan sees the world of parents and children.

Joan said… BUt his older chidren wanted their baby sister! And they found me!

Gert’s comment…finding Joan was the worst thing we siblings ever did…together! How were we to know what a monster she was and is? We were so idealistic! How wonderful it was to be able to have our sister back! Shared genes mean NOTHING. She was raised with anger and hate and she can not relate to any one in any circumstance withOUT her hate and anger. She went after each and every birth family member, including the FATHER. She ‘claims’ that she wanted/wished to stay with the birthfamily and not be adopted! Fool that she is, her life, if she remained with us, would be one filled with difficulties, orphan and foster homes, decades of never belonging to a ‘family unit’. She’s an idiot!

Joan said… You may not agree and you don’t have to, those are your feelings Feelings are different from CIVIL RIGHTS. I have every right to my birth certificate — the one that states the facts of my birth. PERIOD.

Gert’s comment…if feelings are different from ‘civil rights’…why does she write with all her FEELINGS. Why doesn’t she BITCH at the law makers! Does she really think that this person she is yelling at is going to do her bidding?

Joan said… If you had nothing to do with the conception and birth of a child, then your name does not belong on a falsified birth certificate, John!

Gert’s comment…So it MUST be John’s fault that the AUTHORITIES put the wrong name on the birth certificate! Why does she have to argue with a person she DOESN’T know? Because she’s an idiot!

Joan said… I will fight to my dying breath for all adoptees to have the rights

Gert’s comment…heard this many many times. What a waste of a human life. This type of statement only shows her total dedication to herself and her pain. She can’t accept her life and adoption. She is a self-made martyr.

Joan said… Adoptive parents came to be parents by adoption, not birth. Tell the truth, John!

Gert’s comment…She does not know this guy, John, yet she treats him like a child. Here she is in her ‘big girl/mother’ role! She wants others to ‘tell the truth’, yet, she never does!

Joan said… And, to answer to your cutsi “me, me, me” attitude of adoptees: it is our birth records, our property, and our birthrights. STAY OUT OF OTHER PEOPLE’S PERSONAL BUSINESS!

Gert’s comment…yep you can tell that she’s got her red angry face on! Her fists are tight as she screams at a person she DOES NOT know! How dare any one critize her! Joan has never ‘stayed out of other people’s personal business’! That whole book was about OTHER people and their personal business…that’s why it’s libeous!

Joan said… Parents do not have the right to scream, “me, Me, Me” just because they think they can hide from their own child!

Gert’s comment…What? This is how Joan and her adoptive mother interacted together…each one DEMANDING they be in the right and the other to shut up.

Joan said… Go read some adoption psychology books. Look at the damage done to adoptees by closed, sealed adoption.

Gert’s comment…Joan’s stock answer for anyone who doesn’t believe her…go read books on adoption! Books may give insights and information BUT they will not stop people from adopting! Joan wants to rid the world of adoption and she say and do anything until her dying breath! When will that be?

And now Joan’s comment in full…

This is my first time in here. Geshh, John! I don’t know where to begin! So, because you are the adoptive father of 5 boys out of foster care, who suffered abuse and neglect, you think you have the right to defend their natural mothers? To protect their privacy? Because I really don’t know you, and can only know by the little I’ve read, here’s my take on you and why you have these one-sided views:

You think that the birthmothers, and fathers perhaps, may not be the best parents in the world and you don’t want them back in your adoptive sons’ lives. You might be on the defensive because you are in their control now. I’m not really sure what is driving an adoptive parent to defend a natural parent’s perceived right to privacy or confidentiality.

I speak from 35 years of experience living in a reunion. At the age of 18, I was found by a sister I never knew. My adoptive parents never wanted me to know anything about my birthfamily, but they did tell me I was adopted. So, when this phone call came in, I was thrown into shock. My eldest sister told me that I had four older siblings a several younger ones, too. I was the baby of the first five children born to married parents. Our mother died when I was three months old; in fact, she was dying while pregnant with me. Our father let me go into adoption because: a Catholic preiest suggested that would be best, and, my soon to be adoptive aunt, told her brother and his wife, that I was available. She knew my birthmother all of her life.

A few days after this telephone reunion, my adoptive mother dumped all of my personal papers on the kitchen table. “You want your papers, here they are! They mean nothing to me any more!” That was the way my loving mother gave me my Final Order of Adoption, my short form amended birth certificate, my short form birth registration in my birth name, and my true baptismal certificate and my falsified baptismal certificate.

The more I read about adoption reform, the more I realized something was, and is, wrong. First, a baby’s birth is registered. If that child is surrendered for adoption and the adoption is finalized, then the court sends a notice for a new, false, birth certiifcate to be made in the child’s new adoptive name, and the adoptive parents are named, along with where the birth took place: hospital name, was this a single birth ?, what time of day was child born?

I take it John, that you are a non-adoptee. If that is so, you cannot know what it feels like to have your personal, private information stolen from you! That is what adoption does, John! My birthname, my mother’s name, the length of her pregnancy, the time she gave birth to me, the number “4” typed in the box that asked “How many other chidlren born to this mother?”. My father’s name and our address. All of that information was stolen from me! It was sealed by the State of New York! Why? Because of the stupid law of 1930, that made up the stigma of illegitimcay should be hidden, that all adoptees should be able to start over with a clean slate, that all adoptees would benefit from being adopted with a new name, a new identity, free and clear from the sins of their parents.

Well, guess what? I’m not an illegitmate bastard, I am a half orphan! There are no special secrets, no shame, no slutty mother, no dirtty old man father, no drug user, no abuser, no neglectful parents: just a 30 year old dead mother, a grieving 31 year old father, and four screaming kids under the age of 9.

According to the United Nations, they will not release a child for adoption to the United States, untill they have proof that both parents are dead (a full orphan) or, that both parents sign relinquishment papers. So, while I had full blood siblings and a father living within Buffalo’s City limits, I was wisked away to a northern suburb about 5 to 7 miles away from my natural family. United Nations would not have approved of my adoption because I had a living parent.

When my father signed the consent for release of me, he was told by the judge to stay away from my adoptive parents. He was told he could come to look for me in 18 years. He was never given a confidentiality contract to sign, nor was he verbally told this adoption was confidential. He abided by the law and stayed away. BUt his older chidren wanted their baby sister! And they found me!

You may not agree and you don’t have to, those are your feelings. Feelings are different from CIVIL RIGHTS. I have every right to my birth certificate — the one that states the facts of my birth. PERIOD. No one should have the right to falsify anyone’s birth and that is why amended birth certificates are immoral, unethical, and will be illegal someday. The government is wrong to come up with this scam, fraud against adoptees.

If you had nothing to do with the conception and birth of a child, then your name does not belong on a falsified birth certificate, John!

I will fight to my dying breath for all adoptees to have the rights to: their original brith certificates retroactively, and, the right to an adoption certificate instead of a false birth certifcate. Adoptive parents came to be parents by adoption, not birth. Tell the truth, John!

If your sons do not want a reunion with their natural parents, that will be their own decisions. If their natural parents contact your adopted sons after they become of legal age, guess what, you have no say in what takes place. Relationships can and do develope. And if your sons want certified copies of their birth certificates, that is their right, not your right to demand NO, and it is no one else’s right — not even a birth mother — to prevent the very child she gave birth to — to have her wishes to remain annoymous rule over her offsring.

And, to answer to your cutsi “me, me, me” attitude of adoptees: it is our birth records, our property, and our birthrights. STAY OUT OF OTHER PEOPLE’S PERSONAL BUSINESS! All parents have responsibility to their children. Parents do not have the right to scream, “me, Me, Me” just because they think they can hide from their own child! Anyone who does not want a relationship, does not have to participate.

Go read some adoption psychology books. Look at the damage done to adoptees by closed, sealed adoption.

Joan Wheeler who was born Doris Sippel

end

There’s not ONE positive review, or comment, (reviews 1, 2, 3) on Doris M Sippel’s NEW BOOK; An Adopted Woman’s Struggle for Identity

about the first 3 reviews of her 3rd edition of her garbage book

duped by adoption & an woman's Struggle for Identity, a book study

Just before I was about to publish this post developments occurred and other reviews have been published…not to worry I shall in time address them, individually… but for sake of historical developments…we shall continue on…

Oh, sure there’s a 5-star rating but it is not a positive review! Where are all of Doris/Joan M Wheeler’s supporters, friends and fellow adoption activists? Where are the rebuttals on the comments? Joan/Doris must like to STRUGGLE, over and over and over again! What’s the point? She really put her foot in her shit this time!

In case you have NOT seen the reviews and comments this post is about the 3 negative reviews.

Review #one

BAIT AND SWITCH – CON-ARTISTRY, September 23, 2016

By Ruth Pace   Verified Purchase

This review is from: Forbidden Family: An Adopted Woman’s Struggle for Identity (Kindle Edition)

this is classic bait and switch – I purchased previously the kindle…

View original post 1,256 more words

Some adoptees just can’t GET IT that others are NOT interested in their politics and don’t know when to shut the f… up!

Insult me, tell me I’m wrong, browbeat me, and then when I tell you to take a hike, get all pissy about it and tell me I owe you an apology! When I state my position is contrary to yours, accept that and shut up! Don’t make me BE wrong because I disagree with you. Sounds just like how Joan behaves; narcissistic behavior and all!

So when they persist in ramming their agenda down the throat of someone who has said repeatedly to STOP, and they continue ramming…they are doing just what they accuse others of doing … NOT LISTENING. Then they turn EVIL and MEAN and resort to NAME CALLING AND INSULTING. When they behave this way, they lose their credibility, they are NOT effective and they do great harm to their cause.

This happens with any and all browbeating techniques.

In this short pattern of dialog, I’m Person A. Person B is the subject of this post.

Person A sees that Person B has an agenda

Person A doesn’t want to get into it and tries to ignore Person B but

Person B continues to comment stating that

Person B disagrees with several positions of person A.

Person B continues to discuss the disputed issues.

Person A says I’m not interested

Person B continues to lay it all out and onto Person A

Person A says AGAIN, and more forcefully, I’m not interested and this is why.

Person B continues to comment on the disputed issues and says Person A is wrong.

Person A says AGAIN, don’t lecture me

Person B continues to tell Person A they are wrong

Person A finally calls an end to the discussion

Person B won’t let it go and sends private message to Person A

THAT IS AN ATTACK then

Person B still won’t let it go and puts it on Facebook

Person A leaves comment

Person B FINALLY deletes all comments

EXCEPT I have the entire dialog and comments!

And I am presenting it all here!

See Ruth’s blog for details of ‘what’ happened.

https://ruthsippelpace.wordpress.com/2017/01/15/gods-nutty-people-are-everywhere-mm-former-friend-of-joan-wheelerdoris-sippel-has-some-growing-up-to-do/

The adoptee (MM) is a former friend of Joan/Doris who befriended Ruth. MM wants Ruth to write something for her so she could present it to her birth family. So MM is sharing thoughts with Ruth and MM is commenting on various posts on Ruth’s Facebook page.

I had shared a blog post I wrote on Ruth’s Facebook page. MM decides to comment about my blog post and things quickly go off the deep end.

beginning of exchange….

MM I noticed the person above who left a comment said she was a secret. If I am reading that correctly. But from what Ruth Herr Sippel Pace and you have said it doesn’t sound to me that she was ever a secret. Sounds like you guys did know about her. Plus I mean how could you not when your poor mother died?!

Ruth Herr Sippel Pace she was NEVER a secret.

Gert Mcqueen to us she was NEVER a secret, and that is what pisses joan off, we KNEW she didn’t SHE was adopted WE were not

MM I had a feeling she wasn’t a secret. I am. So she should stop pissing and moaning about that. I had to be the one to tell although I’ve only told some. Of course my bio mother is going around telling them to pretend I don’t exist and if they talk to me they are being rude to her, which is pissing me and my adoptive mom off. She really had a chance with you guys and blew it, and it makes no common sense as to why. She’s trying to pretend she was a secret to your family? It’s very condescending to me because I literally am a secret and treated like one by the few who do know.

Gert Mcqueen according to Joan…adoption makes her and her life etc a secret…that’s part of the whole adoption reform movement, that adoption birth certificates…CREATE a falsehood and keeps secrets. I don’t agree with that…there are REAL reasons why birth certificates are changed with adoptions…NOW I do believe that adoptees should have a means to obtain their medical histories BUT that should be without knowing the parents…it’s NOT about secrets…it’s ABOUT privacy…for the parents, birth/adoptive and the child, but Joan and others are beyond reasoning with.

Gert Mcqueen To Joan as an adoptee she didn’t and could not know her birth family that’s LAW…to these adoptees that means they were secrets, that their families were secrets etc etc…

MM Gert Mcqueen Actually an amended birth certificate does keep a secret. I would know this personally. It kept my original surname and my bio parents names from me.

MM Gert Mcqueen Actually you are very wrong on this. Original birth certificates are not sealed because of privacy. Original birth certificates are not sealed for privacy for 2 reasons. Reason A. An original birth certificate is not sealed until the adoption is finalized, so if a baby is given away for adoption but ends up growing up in foster care he or she keeps his or her original birth certificate making privacy null and void. Until their day of adoption they have access to their OBC, so say a kid wants to see his OBC and isn’t adopted until his 9th birthday for some odd reason. He has access to it, the day he becomes adopted he’s not allowed to have it anymore. This makes privacy null and void. Reason B. Original birth certificates were not always sealed. In fact, Kansas and Alaska have never sealed them so adoptees there hang out to their OBC and in Alabama they only sealed for a few years. In Pennsylvania they only started to give out amended birth certificates starting in 1984 because the pro life people erroneously thought it was make fewer abortions (it made no difference). All adoptees deserve their original birth certificate and it should never be sealed.

MM Gert Mcqueen I sent you a friend request btw.

MM Gert Mcqueen “Without knowing the parents”. No, absolutely not. To say this is to say you think it’s fine for me to be a dirty secret. Remember birthparent privacy is a myth and a sugarcoated way of telling people to be someone’s “dirty secret”. As my adoptive mother says, and my own morality and common sense, it is wrong and I should be allowed to get to know my cousins, my uncles,my brother, and my sisters who are adults. No, it is NEVER ok to make someone have to play the role of “stay in the closet and be a dirty secret”. I wouldn’t wish anyone to be in the hell I am in. Please think.

MM Gert Mcqueen The child is an adoptee and not a perpetual child. We do grow up. No, we did not ask for privacy. My adoptive parents did not ask for privacy. Bio mothers don’t ask for privacy and the few that do, still should not get it, which is why I’m mad with NJ and Ontario putting in redactions when releasing the OBC. A person never deserves to allow another person to be their dirty secret, and if that brings them pain, well, that is not the fault of the adoptee, that is the fault of the adoption agency luring them to take away their kid, their own family not supporting them, or as in your case just sucky circumstances where the baby truly couldn’t be kept. But privacy? Never. For this myth of privacy and forcing others, like myself, to be a secret, is what drives the adoptee suicide rate to be so high.

MM Gert Mcqueen Bio medical info can’t be given without permission due to patient/doctor confidentiality. However, what needs to happen is to stop allowing adoption agencies to decide whether or not they want to give the medical info. Hillside of Rochester did this, refusing to give the medical info, when the bio mother wanted to give it, as her/their little girl was having massive seizures. I am sorry to say she died in her twenties. I am amazed they are still in business.

Gert Mcqueen MM I adopted my own birth son with 2nd husband, there was NO SECRET, child gave permission for adoption, sure his birth certificate was changed, but that is NO issue

Gert Mcqueen MM I really don’t care! Please! I believe that there is a need for reform but I dont’ care to get into things

Gert Mcqueen MM yes I see that you sent me a request, please NOTE that I do not accept any friend requests I only have family members period no exceptions

MM Gert Mcqueen Changing a birth certificate is a huge issue when the adoptee has no say.

MM Gert Mcqueen Ok, I understand on that.

Gert Mcqueen MM please do not lecture me on adoption politics! I adopted my own son, and my parental rights were VIOLATED by joan and her politics I will not accept anymore BS over this issue…I believe what I believe, you believe what you believe

MM Gert Mcqueen So you don’t care that I am a dirty secret. Well, thanks. Shows you have low morals.

MM Gert Mcqueen Ummmm no see I believe and know fact. That’s the difference. There is no such thing as birth parent privacy or adoptee privacy or any privacy. I just proved you wrong on that from the comments above.

Gert Mcqueen MM  my child that I adopted was 16 years old…NO ADOPTIOn is the same…stop stop stop, don’t give me the adoption policts

MM Gert Mcqueen 16 is a HUGE difference here, but the way you talked it sounded like you were talking of infant adoption. You have to be more clear. If you are referring to the adoption of older kids then you are right, if I am talking about infant adoption then I am right. So both of us need to be more specific.

Gert Mcqueen MM  excuse me!!! I don’t care about any adoption politics… as a mother who adopted and my family was VIOLATED by Joan Wheeler because I adopted I’ve had 30 plus years of heart ache because I’ve been condemn for the act of adoption I DO NOT have to be more specific when I talk about the fact that adoption is NOT AN EVIL I do believe that we have no more need to discuss this

MM Gert Mcqueen Wrong. It doesn’t matter if you are an adoptive mother when you state a falsehood that original birth certificates were sealed for privacy reasons when I state to you the specific facts and laws of why they are not nor ever were a secret. And I am sorry Joan Wheeler is a nincompoop and I wish she wasn’t, but that doesn’t change the facts I present to you. I never said adoption is evil. Adoption can be a blessing, but you do not ask someone to be a dirty secret and you do not seal an OBC. Adoptees deserve their OBC like any other person if they ask for them. As for thinking adoption is evil that’s just silly talk and I never said that. Some kids need to be adopted. I was not one of them but your son surely was.

Gert Mcqueen I am NOT responsible for anyone but myself and my children when they were minor and I will not be lectured to or judged by anyone Megan Mary…the laws are the laws I didn’t make them and I can’t change them please NEVER talk to me again about adoption I shall NEVER SEE IT YOUR WAY so please stop commenting to me…good night

MM Ruth Herr Sippel Pace Amazing how your sister thinks she is right that original birth certificates are sealed for privacy reasons when I just gave her a lesson in law, state and federal, proving that original birth certificates are never sealed for privacy reasons, but I guess some people have an ego that is too big to oh wait, know they were wrong. Nor did your sister bother to apologize to me in saying that the bio parent has a right to stay hidden which means has a right to keep us adoptees as dirty secrets so that only lead me to think your sister thinks it’s ok for us adoptees to be dirty secrets (maybe I am wrong but it sure sounds like she thinks it’s ok for me to be a dirty secret). Sorry but my own adoptive mother would strongly disagree with everything Gert thinks. Your sister has a lot to learn when it comes to why OBCs are sealed, she just refuses to believe it.

Gert Mcqueen MM are you brain dead? can’t you get it when a person tells you to stop lecturing them? who the hell do you think you are to tell me that I’m wrong? my lawyer, my judge? my ego…is that something that you NEED to judge? I should apologize to you because you OFFENDED me? I DON’T HAVE anything more to learn about adoption…Megan YOU NEED TO LEARN TO STOP BERATING PEOPLE. continue to belive what you want about me, doesn’t matter, you MEAN NOTHING TO ME…go away

END of exchange…

BUT she can’t let go…

She sends me a private message AFTER I told her to get lost…this is consider not only rude but an attack.

MM NO you showed your true colors when you decided to say you think birthparent privacy exists and even worse should exist. Which equivalates to being someone’s dirty secret. So thanks for telling ME it’s ok for my bio family to treat me like utter shit. That is showing your true colors. And thanks for showing ME your true colors in deciding to totally not listen at all to the REAL reason why OBCs are and were sealed, which is NOT privacy and Kansas and Alaska prove that!

I then send a private message to Ruth…

sorry but I dislike mary megan she’s an asshole, I should be more specific??? NO she needs to stop her adoption propaganda with someone , me, who has adopted,, I will not tolerate that person’s BS anymore

THEN I checked her Facebook page…here want I found MINUTES after she sent me a PM

Megan Mary 6 mins · Think it’s okay for adoptees to be someone’s dirty little secret grow some morals because your thinking strategy is disgusting. Just unfriended someone because they and their sister believe in the falsehood of “birthparent privacy” after I explained to them IT DOES NOT EXIST and that it’s fine for adoptees to be someone’s secret. The one bitch replies with “I’m an adoptive mother, I don’t needa lecture and won’t see it your way”. It’s not, my way, and it’s state, provincial, and federal law. My goodness eejits need to pick up a law book for once, even if it’s only where you’re from! I’m sitting here knowing law in multiple states, provinces, and nations, but I guess not everyone wants to be intelligent. Does it look like I give a rat’s behind you adopted? My own adoptive mother thinks you’re a word that rhymes with punt. Shoes belong in the closet. Not people!

Zoë Hildebrand people and their bollocks.

AND my comment to her, on her Facebook page…

Gert Mcqueen nice going! showed your true colors didn’t you

AT THAT she deleted all comments

SO…pious little girl that she is…shows her true colors…typical with these types of adoptees.

  1. Reblogged this on Refuting a Book of Lies: Forbidden Family — and commented:

    follow up on Ruth’s recent post, links are within the posts…

    Edit

  2. interesting – and thank you Gert for posting the entire exchange, as it had happened, and deleted by Megan while I was offline.

    Megan contacted ME on July 18, 2016 AFTER she had a fight with Joan Wheeler/Doris Sippel – our adopted-out, then reunited with, younger sister.
    She said she had been reading my blog and was appalled at Joan’s behaviors towards me.
    Way back when she first contacted me – after reading my blog, she said “I urge you when reading this line from your blog “Gert and I don’t really care about any adoption issues” to please have a change of heart. ”

    to which I replied:
    “Megan, when I said (on my blog) that we don’t care about adoption issues, that meant that it isn’t on the top of our cause list. – we are aware of the issues and are for reform of a more truthful birth certificate and of course medical information, genetic background info.”

    So yeah, Gert is right – these adoptees just can’t get it that others are NOT interested in their politics and don’t know when to shut the f…. up!

    Megan Mary’s passion, as is Joan’s passion is their adoption issues. Fine. Good for them.
    THEIR ISSUES AND PASSIONS ARE NOT MINE.
    I told little Megan that right from the get go.
    She must be learning impaired that she didn’t get that.

    She got her panties in a bunch when Gert told her over and over to shut up and leave her alone.

    She told me that she thinks Joan is a wack-a-doo. Well I think that too. I also believe that Megan Mary is also a wack-a-do.
    For several months, Megan Mary and I were connected on facebook. We had a few interesting conversations on facebook, both private and public. Megan doesn’t know me. I don’t know her. All we know about each other is what’s on facebook. And I am very clear on facebook what I will not tolerate. And that is DISRESPECTING ME AND MY VIEWPOINTS.
    And since I told Megan right from the get go, that I am NOT interested in adoption issues, and she didn’t get it – or rather REFUSED to get it – then further dug herself into a hole by going after one of my family members who has the same viewpoint as I do – well I view her as a wack-a-do.
    Then to further cement her reputation as a wack-a-do, Megan turns coward – deletes things, unfriends and blocks ME, who had nothing to do with the exchange between her and Gert (I was snoozing on the couch with the cat).
    Megan, are you 31 or are you 10 years old? Grow up, grow a spine.

What REALLY is the motive of Joan M Wheeler taking her birth name of Doris M Sippel? Was it THOUGHT OUT or is there a MOTIVE?

If an adoptee changes their name, legally, back to the birth name, what is the motive/reason? Is it really a good thing to ‘take back’ their birth name? What about others in that birth family whom …

Source: What REALLY is the motive of Joan M Wheeler taking her birth name of Doris M Sippel? Was it THOUGHT OUT or is there a MOTIVE?

Joan Mary Wheeler aka Doris Michol Sippel has her very first book signing and blows it by screaming at another author there, then calls for other adoptees to harass the woman AND publishes the woman’s phone number on social media.

Read this blog post by Gert McQueen to read how Joan aka Doris started screaming at another author at a book signing event held at the Buffalo Historical Museum. And then goes after the author by t…

Source: Joan Mary Wheeler aka Doris Michol Sippel has her very first book signing and blows it by screaming at another author there, then calls for other adoptees to harass the woman AND publishes the woman’s phone number on social media.

If this is HOW Doris M Sippel/Joan M Wheeler behaves, towards another author, at her FIRST BOOK SIGNING, than she ought to be banned from book signings!

this idiot ought to be banned from book signings…she is dangerous

duped by adoption & an woman's Struggle for Identity, a book study

Doris/Joan is an idiot! She’s so in love with herself and her so-called message to the public that she doesn’t see that she makes an ass out of herself. But I’m sure others see her behavior, as you will see within this post.

There are THREE separate items in this post; all are related to each other.

I was shown a Facebook page announcement for a book signing, where Doris/Joan was to be in attendance, AFTER the show was over. Ruth and I then left a couple of comments.

ITEM ONE  

See this for the announcement. The Buffalo History Museum added 12 new photosNovember 25 at 3:13pm

Ruth Herr Sippel Pace             I did not attend this – but will say this: Doris Michol Sippel’s book “Forbidden Family: An Adopted Woman’s Struggle for Identity,” is nothing but a rehash of a book…

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