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I admit it! I lied about not writing a letter and making a phone call to Joan Wheeler!

by on October 11, 2011

I admit it!  NOTE make sure to see update at end of post

I have always maintained that I never wrote more than one letter to Joan Wheeler. The one letter that I admit to writing was to her adoptive mother, Dorothy, in 1982, informing Dorothy of Joan’s dirty deeds regarding my minor children and my life. Even though I dispute Joan’s ‘version’ of that letter, I do admit writing it. I also maintained that I only made one phone call to Joan in 2005, or there about, but I lied. I made a  phone call to Joan in 1998.

Well now, I had totally forgotten that I did indeed write a second letter, to Joan, in June 1998. Recently I was given a copy of it AND the letter from Joan to me that caused me to write a letter in June of 98 to Joan. I also was reminded that I did place a call to Joan because she wanted to talk with me, but as usual when I called she hung up on me and claimed I harassed her.

Why did I not remember that I wrote such a letter? Well, here is the last line of my letter…I do not have fools around me. I dismissed you years ago. Why haven’t you disappeared yet? So you see, once I mailed that letter, to Joan, I again forgot about it and Joan….until she resurfaced, years later, with yet more harassments and that BOOK. And if I forgot about the letter I also forgot about the phone call.

Joan’s usual modus of operation is based on bipolar mood swings. After a period of intense hyperactivity, where she believes everyone is out to get her, she then slips into a depression where she begins a great need to make peace with those she thought were out to get her. At that point she ‘needs’ to talk with them, write them letters and offer hopeful statements of peace. But, then when the other person attempts to communicate with her, she quickly turns everything back into the feeling of being harassed and she blames everyone for that crime, totally forgetting that she herself initated the contact.

So now that I have admitted I lied and showed some insights into Joan’s behavior pattern, let’s find out the rest of the story.

Ruth has been going over her files, typing in many letters from years past. We see first here part of Ruth’s notes of explanation of how Joan came to send Ruth a letter to me. Then we shall see Joan’s letter to me and then my letter to Joan. Remember now, Joan has always maintained that she NEVER HARASSED US.

Ruth receives an envelope addressed to Ruth Sippel and John Pace, certified mail May 27, 1998. A note from Joan on the bottom of the envelope says: “Important Information Enclosed Please do not discard. This is serious. Enclosure to be (unclear). Ruth photocopied the envelope.

Some of Ruth’s notes indicate these points that she would have said to Joan if the opportunity arose…the opportunity is now:

If you (Joan) wanted me (Ruth) to send something to Gert for you, you should have addressed the envelope “Gert McQueen, c/o Ruth Sippel not John Pace and left a little note to me asking nicely to send it on to Gert. I probably wouldn’t have anyway but it would have gone a little way in rebuilding trust. However the way you went about it shows that you can’t ever, ever be trusted. Gert just called. Why did you hang up on Gert when she called – we thought you wanted to talk to her – obviously despite your “good wishes” expressed in your letter you are out to start trouble. Once a liar, always a liar.

The Letter: Monday May 25, 1998

Dear Ruth and Gert:

I heard about the letter that someone in Charleston, South Carolina sent to Gert. The letter said that Colby Bell would be challenging her to a power duel.

Well, it just happened that my ex-husband was up in Buffalo for the holiday weekend to see his children. I wasn’t going to say anything at first, but deep down I knew I had to ask. Colby doesn’t even know who this guy is: they met only once. Colby was with his friend when this guy came up to speak with Colby’s friend. It was through introductions that this other guy said he was from Watertown. That’s when Colby mentioned that he knew his ex-wife’s sister lived there. The guy said he knew Gert and that he was part of the religion she practices. Colby did not say he was going to challenge Gert. Evidently, whoever this man is, he wants to cause trouble for Gert and for Colby.

Colby is on his way back to Charleston now. He asked me to write to you to explain his side of the story and to give you his phone number to call him collect to discuss the letter and the implications made in the letter. If possible, both he and I would like a copy of this letter. Colby wants the copy because he knows he can locate the man who wrote the letter through their common friend. Colby wants to find out from this guy face to face why he would write such a letter to someone he knows (Gert) and involve someone he doesn’t know (Colby) in a threatening situation that has a rippling effect throughout many peoples lives.

Colby and I do not want to interfere in your lives. We wish you all the best in your chosen life paths and certainly do not any harm to come to you. The past is in the past; we both want peace for the two of you and for us in our separate, but connected lives. We share the children, of course, so we are concerned that no harm comes to them. We are both aware that this letter from a man who met Colby only once was written to you, Gert,and we are deeply sorry for any pain it has caused you. We are not responsible for this man writing the letter, but we will do everything we can to find out why this stranger wrote it and to prevent any further interference in your lives. May you both find happiness and peace in whatever it is you chose in life.

Sincerely, Your sister Joan Wheeler

And now Gert’s letter to Joan:  June 1998


There were real reasons why I left Buffalo in 1982 and you were one of them. There are real reasons why after I saw you in 1992, that I still wish not to have any contact with you. You must learn to accept that. You must learn to accept the fact that I have had and still do have a LIFE OF MY OWN and you don’t fit into it. You must learn to accept the fact that I am EVERY HAPPY AND CONTENT with my life.

You must learn to accept the fact that Ruth has nothing to do with my life, she is not the person YOU should be contacting when you REALLY wanted to contact me. I and Ruth do NOT talk about you, we each have our lives to live and we live them SEPARATELY, without thoughts of you.

You must learn that in this country, the US, we all have freedom of religion. It is my constitutional right and my soul right to have the religion of the Gods of my choice. You must learn that you can not be judgmental about my religion. You do not have claim on my soul, only I do.

The scene and incident you caused, after seeing me in 1992, was sufficient proof to me, that I should continue on with my “divorce” from you. To refresh your memory, after what I and Ruth thought was a very nice visit with you, in which, I shared the joy of my religious vocation, you went to Dad telling him that my religion was detrimental to my mental health. That scene of yours caused pain to Dad and others and affirmed for me that you are just not happy that others are happy, and you need to be the center of attention. You are NOT the center of my attention, my Gods have claim of my attention.

I have been very busy since 1992 and I’m not done yet. I have lots to do, and I shall continue to do as I will. I don’t need your approval and I certainly don’t need nor want your input.

For some reason you have seen fit to make something out of nothing. So I’m going to tell you what the nothing is all about. The world is rather large, and yet it is a small world. I know and have contact with many people all over the world. I am well known in certain areas of the world. I am in the publishing business. Freedom of press belongs to he who owns one, and I own one. Freedom of religion belongs to he who fights for that freedom, and I fight for my religion. I publish an international religious magazine, I publish my own works and the works of others. I am a well-known and well-respected priestess, leader, writer, activist for my religion. I am known around the world. I’m not dead yet, I am not done with my work for my Gods and the religion, and when I am dead, my work and my words, and the words of others like me, that I publish, will be there for generations yet unborn to learn about our ancestral folk religion and for them to return to and reclaim what is rightfully their own Gods and religion.

You haven’t a clue and therefore you best learn to keep your mouth shut about me and my religion.

You seem to have taken some kind of offense about some minor contact between Colby and some guy at some stupid event in SC in which my name and my religion were mentioned. Neither Ruth nor I am responsible for some chance meeting between Colby and some minor guy out there who happens to know about me. Like I said I am published world-wide, many people know my name and my religion and I have correspondence with many people around the world.

And just how did Colby get to know anything about my religion? From you. In 1992 you told me that Colby had been in the SCA, etc. I told you that SCA was not a religion. Then you and only you told Colby about what you thought my religion was, this is how Colby knew about my religion. I have NEVER spoken to Colby about my religion, because I left Buffalo in 1982 and have not seen Colby since then, and I didn’t come into my religion until 1988.

So years go by and Colby meets some guy at a SCA event, and my religion and my name is mentioned, and Colby says he is my former brother-in-law and the guy tells me he met someone who claimed to be so and that my former brother-in-law also had stated that he (Colby) had once challenged me on some point on the religion. Guess what? Colby has NEVER SPOKEN to me about my religion!!! And the statement in question that Colby claims to have challenged me on is a bullshit statement. Colby, if he knew anything about my religion, would know that his so-called claim of challenging me was bogus.

So the guy Colby meets, tells me about the encounter with someone who claims to be my former brother-in-law. I tell the guy that there is only one of the many former brothers-in-law that I have that would even remotely be able to associate me and what he thinks is my religion, because you yourself Joan told me that Colby was in SCA and wanted to name your future boy-child Thor and you would not have that. Again, proof that Colby got what ever he got from YOU not me, cause I have NEVER spoken to Colby about it. Colby is just one of the many thousands of fools out there that hasn’t got a clue about things, and I don’t give my attention to fools, be they former brother-in-laws or not.

So I tell the guy who met Colby that I have not spoken to Colby since 1982 and it would be best if the guy just left Colby to his own fantasies. Obviously the guy must have spoken to Colby and told Colby what I said, and you then take it upon yourself to make a big deal over it. You obviously don’t know how to get a hold of me, so you write a letter to Ruth indicating on the envelope that I too will get this letter, knowing full well she will call me. I have not received a letter from you, because contrary to what you indicated on the envelope to Ruth, you didn’t send me a letter, so why indicated so if you weren’t going to do so.

Ruth has nothing to do with a chance meeting between Colby and some other idiot at some stupid SCA event. I know lots of people out there, you just never know how I’LL FIND OUT WHAT YOU ARE DOING. I have a thousand eyes and ears.

Joan you best learn this: forget about me, forget about what I may or may not be doing, forget about what you think about (you know) about my life, my religion or anything else about me. My life is MY LIFE not yours. Learn to pay attention to your own life and leave me and Ruth and others alone. We don’t care what you think about how we live our lives, or how we attend to our afterlifes. We don’t care how you live your life or how you attend to your afterlife.

If you really cared about me and really wanted to know about the incident you would NOT have hung up on me when I called you. You don’t want to hear the truth, the truth scares you, you don’t want to talk to me about my religion, because it scares you. It scares you because you don’t understand it and when we don’t understand something we condemn it.

Don’t play any more games, I am not someone you should trifle with. You messed with my children years ago, and I have not forgotten. Don’t mess with my religion ie, my soul, because I guarantee you I shall never forget it. There is a big difference between forgiving and forgetting. I forgave you, in 1992, for what you did to my children, but I didn’t forget. And I wasn’t even out of town, that day, when you “turned on” me, by going to Dad with some bullshit nonsense about my religion. That proved to me, then, that you can not be trusted. I have not forgotten that day in 1992 and I do not forgive you, and now, in 1998, you continue to further cause trouble with others over my religion. I shall never forgive this and I shall certainly never forget it.

I do not have fools around me. I dismissed you years ago. Why haven’t you disappeared yet?    Gert

For further information on how this letter exchange fits into the whole picture of Joan’s tale of woe of her victim hood of being harassed and how she never does anything herself, see my post called…

Joan Wheeler’s own behavior….exhibit A on August 18, 2011

The problem with paper and lies are that they SHALL always come back to haunt you. NEVER, EVER put on paper what you don’t want coming back to you! Joan Wheeler never learns! She once told Ruth that she ‘didn’t care how much paper Ruth has on Joan’…well what does Joan think now?

This is only the beginning of resurfacing letters of Joan Wheeler’s harassment of her birth siblings!

UPDATE JULY 2017; as older posts are being seen I, Gert, am updating with links to my second blog and a Facebook page wherein I expose AGAIN the lies, fabrications and hate that Joan M Wheeler (Doris Michol Sippel) says about me and family. The first book ‘Forbidden Family, A Half Orphan’s Account of Her Adoption, Reunion and Social Activism’ published in 2009, was pulled from publication by the publisher in May 2011 due to libelous material in it. Then in 2015, she ‘self-published’ a ‘revised’ version calling it ‘Forbidden Family, an adoptee duped by adoption’, being her own editor and owner. This woman has no shame no sense of family honor! Then in 2016 Joan changed her name back to her birth name and reedited and republished the SAME crap in another book; a Third edition! CALLED ‘Forbidden Family: An Adopted Woman’s Struggle for Identity’! Talk about conning people!     this blog’s title/sub title is… DUPED BY ADOPTION & AN WOMAN’S STRUGGLE FOR IDENTITY, A BOOK STUDY an in-depth analyzes of the books called Forbidden Family; My Life as an Adoptee Duped by adoption & An Adopted Woman’s Struggle for Identity by Joan M Wheeler/Doris M Sippel.

in addition…

This author, whether she goes by Joan M Wheeler or Doris M Sippel, has three books, all the same but for title and author name. There are two ‘discussion’ forums, on Amazon, for two of the books. The first book has one review and several comments related.

The buying public has the right to view and comment on those forums and comments.

Here are those links…

Forbidden Family: My Life as an Adoptee Duped by Adoption forum

Joan Mary Wheeler forum



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