Adult Adoptees Advocating for Change, birth/adoptive families, browbeating people over adoption, confrontations with Joan Wheeler, cyberbullying, sins of omission and suppress of one's own misdeeds, whining, worthlessness
Joan Wheeler has been having identity and multiple personality meltdowns all her life; isn’t time to solve that problem?
On the forum for Adult Adoptees Advocating for Change we find that Joan Wheeler, 1adoptee, has been having these meltdowns for quite some time. It isn’t just a plain old fashion method of getting and keeping attention onto herself. No it’s really very serious and no wonder her life is so miserable, she loves her pain. She calls herself a ‘social worker’ that has been dealing with HELPING people for over 30 years! What a f…ing joke! Not only that by from what we have seen recently, in April and May 2012, this meltdown has manifested in three, that’s 3, different personalities coming out of Joan who actually believes that they are REAL!
Apr 4, 2012 10:17:15 Someone said: I’m glad you have your husband there to care and try to help. I hope you will continue to allow him to try. The non-adopted don’t completely “get it” but sometimes they are willing to put aside their preconceived ideas and just take our word for things. My husband is good at that as well and it certainly helps. I am very lucky. My father-in-law is adopted (by a family member) & he had it horrible growing up, but is also able to know his real roots. So my husband always saw adoption as a bad thing, even before I did.
1adoptee said: You are very lucky to have a husband to be there with you. When I was going throughmy darkest months and years, I was 18, 19, 20 and didn’t get married until 27. I had to go through the toughest identity crisises in those early ages and early stages of reunion — and I had no one with me. Scream and cry and hold your breath, yeah, I did that, too. This adoption identity stuff really hurts. It was the worst when I ha my kids because I couldn’t be the mother they needed as I was in such internal misery. And then a lousy marriage and a divorce. It hurts being alone, yet over the years some of the pain has subsided. I did my worst crying just about a year and half ago when issues flared up again with my adoptive mother. So much pain, so little help. And I have to remind myself to breath. You are not alone. :grlcry:
Some people just want to stay with their misery! Hey, if it hurts so damn much why continue doing it? I mean there does come a point when common sense should kick in. How many years, decades even, does it take for someone to ‘get it’…that there may be a better way of living? Yeh I know I’ve said it before; if you don’t like your life…change it! Some people obviously like their life of pain…why else would they continue to live in it!
Okay, so adoptees have this thing about not-knowing their ‘roots’; they are not the only people in the world with that bit of ‘not-knowing’…have these adoptees ever given a thought to those people who’s families, for example, were victims of genocide? And these adoptees think they have problems!
Not knowing your roots is not a reason to hang on to self-destructive behavior patterns and abusing everyone in two families forever! Sorry, but these adoptees’ and their whining and blaming everyone else is just a way for them to NOT take responsibility for their own actions and I don’t buy it!
Joan Wheeler was not so innocent in 1979-1982 when she was what 23 to 26? when she KNEW what was ‘best’ for MY FAMILY, when she interfered with my minor children and my adoption of my son! No she knew just what she was doing, meddling and condemning others, while she lacked experience in life, didn’t have children of her own nor was a social worker. No she decided what was wrong with my family and she didn’t care that she caused major troubles within MY family. No, Joan Wheeler was NEVER innocent, only stupid!
I find it rather disgusting that a 56 year old is still crying in her milk! Talking about this shit doesn’t help the others; it is just another form of enabling, all these sick adoptees keep each other sick and in misery. They are not happy unless they can go out and beat up pro-adoption people up!
Joan was all alone! That’s news to us! She had TWO families, but Joan never wanted any of them, all she ever wanted to do was piss and moan because ‘no one understood her’ which gave her the right to browbeat everyone into her way of thinking! If she is still pissing and moaning all these years later it’s because she has no one left who gives a damn about her.
She has no self-respect; she doesn’t care how she is portraying herself here…
scream and cry and hold your breath…I couldn’t be the mother they needed as I was in such internal misery…a lousy marriage and a divorce… hurts being alone…some of the pain has subsided…my worst crying just about a year and half ago when issues flared up again with my adoptive mother. So much pain, so little help…and this helps how??
She has never master the art of ‘getting herself in control’...So much pain, so little help. And I have to remind myself to breath. Nope, she doesn’t want to get better, she loves her pain!
And she believes she is helping others when she says…You are not alone…
Misery loves company; that’s why she continues to cry in her milk. Sick!
okay, from what comes out of Joan’s mouth: she’s been a “social worker” helping people for over 30 years. WRONG!
Let’s do some math. this is the year 2012. 2012 minus 30 years is 1982. Joan BY HER OWN ADMISSION IN HER BOOK AND ELSEWHERE – didn’t go to college for her social work degree until 1995 – 1999.
She couldn’t be the mother her kids needed? WHY NOT? oh yeah, I forgot, she’s been HELPING PEOPLE FOR MORE THAN 30 YEARS!.
Let’s do the math again people (pay attention Pilgrim/Chimp/Brian) – 2012 minus 30 years takes us back to 1982. Joan’s son was born in 1983 and her daughter was born in 1986. So now I ask this question: WHY THE HELL WAS JOAN WHEELER “HELPING PEOPLE” SINCE 1982, BUT DIDN’T HELP HER OWN CHILDREN?
As far as her “social worker” employment – BULLSHIT – she worked as a DRIVER in the early 80′s for the New York Division of Youth DRIVING kids back and forth to appointments. SHE WAS A DRIVER OF A CAR. SHE HAD NO TRAINING IN COUNSELING THE KIDS OR OTHERS.
She also ‘worked” as a VOLUNTEER – manning telephones and screening calls for the Crisis Services. – THIS DOES NOT QUALIFY AS A SOCIAL WORKER!
I trained as volunteer with the Buffalo Police in 1998 to man telephone calls in the police satelite station at the Newburgh Coalition of Block Clubs. I took in calls for barking dogs, loud music, nuisance neighbors. It was not even a 911 phone number. It was a community service phone number. JUST BECAUSE I ANSWERED TELEPHONES FOR THE POLICE DEPARTMENT DOES NOT MAKE A FIRST RESPONDER OR AN EMERGENCY TELEPHONE PERSONNELL!
I can not and will not state that I am.
For Joan Wheeler to state that she has worked as a social worker – she is committing FRAUD! This is resume padding at its worst!
OUT WITH IT JOAN YOU COWARD – GIVE US THE NAMES OF THE AGENCY YOU WORKED FOR AS A SOCIAL WORKER.
DON’T COME ON YOUR “DEFENDING JOAN WHEELER BLOG” AND CALL ME A COWARD – I tell the truth in all I write on this blog and on my own blog. Joan and her imaginary playmate Chimp tell nothing but half-truths, misrepresentations and out-right lies.
A social worker who publicly admits on an internet forum that she failed as a mother? Who writes in her own “truthful” book that she abused her children physically and mentally and abused her adoptive mother physcially and mentally?
If that’s an example of a social worker, I feel sorry for the human services agencies in and around Buffalo New York.
by the way Chimp, I’m still gonna answer your last post – I’ve just been extremely busy. I don’t take time out of my busy schedule for a loser like you. But I’ve carved out some time on Sunday (tomorrow) – so prepared for me to knock you off your self-erected pedastal. ahha ha ha ha
Gert again… and Joan and her imaginary friends don’t like the fact that Ruth and I ‘talk to each other’ via these comments! No, we are not talking to each other, we are adding more information to the topic of any given post. Ruth’s observations are very accurate…Joan was NOT helping people 30 years ago, because she was getting in the middle of other people’s lifes! She was a driver for youth services when she decided to tell my minor children they didn’t have to obey me….how was that helping people, me and my children and my husband? And when Joan interferred with my adoption of my son…how was that helping us? No, Joan is a liar and a bullshitter, plain and simple! Her helping me and my family 30 years ago is why she DOESN’T know a thing about me today, because I divorced her…stupid me…I tried a couple of times to make peace, which she says never happened, because, she only listens to her inner self and her multiple persoanalities and her lack of identity!
Joan only got her social work degree in 1999….that is NOT 30 years ago and where is the employment history? Anyone who wants to make a living must have a resume, where is it? Why doesn’t she produce it? Why is she counseling on the web? Because she can’t work because she is mentally ill.
before anybody starts screaming that Joan’s employment history is private – go take a lookie at her cyberbullying page – she’s got MY employer plastered on it!
Of course, I have my employer listed on my facebook page. And have PROUDLY stated on my blog and on my facebook that I am a PROUD employee of Buffalo General Hospital – and on September 18 2012, I will be celebrating my 40th anniversary there. That’s right – FORTY years with the same employer – despite Joan trying some bullshit back in 1994 and 1995 trying to get me fired over BULLSHIT. Her hospital bill got mixed up with somebody else’s. She automatically ASSUMED I had gone into the hospital computer and tampered with her bill – She writes about this on page 332 of her stupid book. She says she contacted the director of the billing department. They checked into her complaint. They found me innocent. First of all, the computers on the nursing stations were NOT EVEN CONNECTED to the billing department computers. Second, they can track every keystroke you make. Third, the mistake was tracked to a typing mistake – that occured at about 4pm. I’m not in the building at that time, nor am I anywhere near the billing department.
Joan was told by hospital officials that I was innocent. But she wasn’t going to have it. When she first discovered the erroneous bill – she ASSUMED I had done it. Then she SPECULATED how I did it, then she BELIEVED that I had done it. Never mind my employer told her I hadn’t. So what does Joan do? SHE REFUSES TO ACCEPT REALITY AND SETS OUT TO PROVE TO PEOPLE THAT I AM A COMPUTER HACKER – She calls my employer almost every day for six months! She calls various departments throughout the hospital – departments that don’t even know who I am – and tells them I am a computer hacker and should be fired!
My manager at the time, C.A. refused her phone calls! An assistant manager took one call and asked Joan point-blank “Does this have anything to do with Ruth’s job performance?” Joan said “No.” Then G.W. said, “Then we have nothing to talk about.” Joan said “don’t you know what kind of people you have working for you?” G. W. said, “Yes, I do. I have known Ruth for almost 20 years and I am quite pleased with her job performance.” G.W. then hung up on Joan. G.W. told me this herself and described Joan’s phone call as “bizarre.”
When I first heard of this mess – I went to P.S., the director of the billing department and introduced myself as “the horrible Ruth Sippel.” He looked at me like “HUH?” then I said, “I’m the sister of Joan Wheeler.” He groaned and put his head between his hands and bent over his desk.
“What the hell has she been doing?” I asked. (Joan sent me a copy of a letter she had written to him and I happened to be at the hospital during the daytime – so I went to see the guy. That’s when I found out about all the phone calls Joan had been placing all over the hospital. There had been a meeting with hospital administration and everybody had been told NOT to tell me about it! SO WE SEE HOW MY EMPLOYER LOOKED OUT FOR ME! But since the cat was out of the bag (February 1995) – I questioned supervisors, secretaries, my manager, my assistant manager and found out everything.
SO COME ON COWARD JOAN – THIS WAS ALSO THE SAME TIME YOU WERE WRITING BULLSHIT LETTERS TO THE MAYOR OF BUFFALO ABOUT ME – GIVING OUT MY PERSONAL BUSINESS AND MEDICAL HISTORY. –
AND I AM NO COWARD – BECAUSE I HAVE ALREADY POSTED THESE LETTERS ON MY BLOG. -yepper! ACTUAL LETTERS FROM JOAN WHEELER HERSELF! The letters that prove that Joan Wheeler is nothing but a cowardly sadistic harassing troublemaking bitch.
Come on Joan – coward – tell us why you were trying to get me fired from my job over nothing, at the same time you called child abuse on yourself, blaming me for it, to get my fiance to break up with me. AND wrote letters to him at his mother’s house TELLING him to leave me. And I have posted those letters on my blog too.
Along with the actual court documents that prove that I was never arrested, nor placed on probation, like you put in your book and keep saying to her Chimpy imaginary playmate.
So we see WHY Joan was not the mother that her kids needed – NOT because of her “helping people” by being a social worker – she wasn’t the proper mother of her kids because she was too damn busy writing letters and making phone calls – to harass me! To get me fired from my job and to get my fiance to leave me. Social worker my ass! She’s a SOCIAL MENACE!