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Joan Wheeler, aka, #forbiddenfamily doesn’t know when it’s time to SHUT UP.

by on May 27, 2013

She just doesn’t know that she has become a broken record. She should change her tune, shut up and disappear. She doesn’t get it! No one wants to hear her garbage, particularly people who believe in adoption and who do adopt. She is so ‘one with her pain’ that she can’t see how others are mocking her! She is never going to erase and outlaw adoption, so why doesn’t she shut up! Well, she’s a sick puppy, who only has one brain cell left. She must like giving me more material to work on! Be that as it may…

A few weeks ago, after being on Huffington Post and having her crap discussed and her friends deflated and dismissed, Joan is at it again! This time going after  ‘open adoption’ and those that practice it. Doesn’t matter what type of adoption it is, Joan Wheeler is totally against it. And she doesn’t mind telling them all what they are doing wrong. She’s the world’s adoption police!

So this new police action of Joan’s was in regards to this article…I’m Raising Someone Else’s Children and can be found at…

On her Twitter account Joan boasted May 16… Waiting for my four comments to post. wanna bet they won’t publish them? I’ll wait till 6pm, then post them on my blog. TBA

Well, now isn’t that interesting! See, Joan knows that she is controversial. She keeps trying to find new and improved ways to browbeat and condemn pro-adoption issues and people. She likes to have an audience, a cheering group, a fan club; she’s fond of telling everyone she’s been at this ‘a long time’. And with her experience with Huffington Post, she knows there could be some difficulty, but, she’s ready for that! She’ll show them!

Of course, her comments were posted around 1pm! On face value there wasn’t that much for ‘moderators’ to ‘flag’. Comments by others and mine and Ruth’s were also posted! By 9pm it was ALL OVER! It’s apparent, to those of us that have seen Joan in action, that those in charge, at Huffington Post, are fully aware of Joan Wheeler, all with her aliases, and really have had enough of her. They are allowing her to sprew her garbage, knowing full well that others are going to nail her! Joan is the only one that DOESN’T get it! No one wants to hear her message. She hasn’t a clue about what is SAID about her behind her back!

Joan believes that she has a MISSION to change the world. Around May 15/16 Joan said on her Twitter… As writers, we have the power to change how our readers view the world!

Well, yes writers DO change the world, but they don’t do it by lying, as she did in her libelous book (now pulled from publication), nor by browbeating and attacking other citizens of the world! In this post, here, I am NOT going to reprint Joan’s garbage positions. If you want to see them, you’ll have to go to the Huffington Post link. The points I’m making here are that Joan’s positions comes from her HATE AND ANGER. No matter how she words her ‘positions’ it always comes out poisoned with her HATE AND ANGER. People will NOT stand for that! And the author of the article, in which Joan attacked, put Joan on notice! The author will NOT take on the guilty, shame and condemnation that Joan Wheeler attacked her with!

As to the following comments I am reprinting here, as soon as I saw the contents of Joan’s comments I knew I had to response. I have been following and admire the writings of the author of this particular Huffington Post article. I also have been following and was asked to write a guest post on a ‘open adoption’ site. You can see post here….

Love it or hate it…the fuller version…by gertmcqueen on November 4, 2012

But to return to the present purpose of THIS post; under my screen name of ‘honorsake‘ I submitted the following two comments after seeing Joan’s browbeating 4 part comments.

honorsake  12:49 PM on 05/16/2013 Why does forbiddenfamily always have to throw a wet-blanket on everyone’s happeness? For the record, I am in favor of open adoption records for adoptees. I am an adopted  mother. I adopted my birth son (age16) with 2nd husband in 1981. At that time forbiddenfamily  attempted to ‘stop’ my adoption process, for the reasons she gives here..birthcertificates… which had nothing to do with my FAMILY and my parental rights and decisions. Her position is 100% anti-adoption of any kind, period! While some of her positions may have merits, her tactics of laying guilt trips and condemning others for making their own life decisions is less than honorable.

honorsake  01:33 PM on 05/16/2013 No matter what type of adoption there is, it will never be acceptable to forbiddenfamily. While some of her positions may have merits, her tactics of negativity, laying guilt trips and condemning others for making their own life decisions is less than honorable.

THEN Joan submitted a 5th comment, a ‘thank you’ to Huffington Post. Then the author of the article and a couple others submitted comments this comment came up…

stunned at insensitivity 05:22 PM on 05/16/2013 Wow. The 5 parts of your 4 part post are almost painful to read.

AND YES…I had to response to that! If was obvious to me that someone else had seen the display of self-martyrdom with all it’s pain

honorsake  06:00 PM on 05/16/2013 how’s this for PAINFUL… less anyone thinks I don’t know what I’m talking about… quoted directly from book by and called ‘Forbidden Family’ of which I am part of that birth ‘Forbidden Family’. time period 1981 page 213…‘there was trouble brewing between my eldest sister and myself…started over a year ago, when she married…wanted to adopt…her oldest child…was 14 years old, a bit too old for step-parent adoption.  When they told me about it, I was hurt and angry and very protective of …’s rights. Just as our step-mother grieved when she had to sign relinquishment papers…I tried to get them to see that an elder child’s identity would change and his birth certificate would be sealed, just as mine was, just as our adopted step-sister was and they wouldn’t understand. Instead of listening to me…accused me of being too sensitive…insisted I was obsessed with adoption. They were going ahead with the adoption, despite my protests.’     believe forbiddenfamily at your own risk

AND then the final comment.

Ruth Herr Sippel Pace 08:57 PM on 05/16/2013 how’s THIS for painful and insensitivity: in spring of 1987, I was still reeling from the miscarriage of my son (June 1985) but was still able to drive forbiddenfamily and her new daughter home from hospital in Oct. 86. May 1987 – she had gone to adoption conference and talked to many people including infertile people, as she was telling me on the phone. I said, “I don’t want to talk about this right now.” “oh, but I learned so much about infertility” “I don’t want to talk about this.” “I know more about infertility than you think I do.” At that point I burst into tears and slammed the phone down. forbiddenfamily cares only about ONE person’s “pain” and that’s her own. She is a master trouble-maker – she even contacted my job with false accusations in Nov 2012, and bragged about it here on Huff in Jan. 2013 – we go to court on July 23, 2013.

AGAIN…the conversation has been closed down…what CAN Joan say to that!

NOW there were other points, with in Joan’s comments that I shall address in another blog post.



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