abuser, adoption, adoption reform, adoption reunions, blaming people for your own mess, browbeating people over adoption, bullying, call to arms, change your life, co-dependency, confrontations with Joan Wheeler, emotional vampires, false accusations, family honor, Forbidden Family a book of lies, Joan Wheeler, legitimatebastard, racial biogtry, sins of omission and suppress of one's own misdeeds, transracialeyes.com interracial adoption, wanting to be something you are not, wrong with your sisters
Joan Wheeler is a emotional vampire feeding off of other adoptees, the NPR racial controversy and not bringing anything to the table!
Why does she feel the continued NEED to repeat her misunderstandings and her illnesses? Can you say ATTENTION? She wants to be something she is NOT, depending on the most current fad/controversy.
By all that’s holy in the multiverses! Would SOMEONE put a sock in this woman’s mouth; just a plain sock would do! Seriously now, everyone, ADOPTEES I’m speaking to YOU.
Where does the repeated telling of trauma HELP with healing? Sorry to inform you but it does NOT help. Never has and never will! What does HELP is the LETTING GO of the hurts…setting THEM free so that they BURN up and out of one’s physical, mental and spiritual bodies! If a person is unable or unwilling to do FOR THEMSELVES they are not ever going to get better and they become VAMPIRES – feeding off EVERYONE ELSE’S EMOTIONS. Joan Wheeler is an emotional vampire and she is feeding off all other adoptees who have far more important things to deal with…don’t you!
I have already addressed certain issues regarding the none-racial aspect of Joan’s adoption in the following links.
She has nothing to gain by talking about the various ethnic backgrounds of white races with mixed racial adoptees. Ethnicity is not the same thing as racial differences. Joan is mistaken to believe that she has American Indian and Jewish racial backgrounds in her family. There are NONE. It is only in Joan’s imagination. Again, Joan is misrepresenting our family’s heritage and creating a mockery of what ‘true’ transracial adoption is. All adoptees ought to be ashamed by what Joan writes. She writes PURELY for attention and emotional needs. She even FORGETS what she has said on their own sites! She’s a fucking joke!
Particularly in the recent controversy, in the land of adoptees, via what was presented by NPR Joan is doubly insensitive to the TRUE ISSUES of that controversy. She HAS TO INSIUNATE herself in the middle of the TRANSRACIAL issue because she needs attention. She ALSO NEEDS to feed off, emotionally, from others for her trauma.
What I have read in recent months and what I see here in what Daniel has said…is that more and more adoptees are BACKING AWAY because of the stress of the activism they are involved with, because that activity is affecting their health. But NOT Joan she wants more and more…she feeds off that emotional trauma. She’s ‘got boots on the ground’! She a total dangerous militant! She’s a domestic terrorist! She advocates blowing up government offices of Vital Statics!
Joan medical issues where PRESENT all during her childhood, NOT from when she was FOUND. Joan REFUSES TO PLACE THE BLAME WHERE IT BELONGS with the adoptive mother. And if that’s the root cause for why adoption is bad FINE, but she needs to stop lumping the birth family into this. Everything that happened to Joan, from the time she became an adult is A DIRECT RESULT of her own behavior.
So here’s the newest version of Joan Wheeler ranting and raving…
SInce I did not search, but was found when 18 years old, I have had to deal with flight/fright response all of my adult life of 40 years. Many illnesses resulted: autoimmune, bladder/kidney infections, colds/flu, digestive problems, nausea, vomiting, muscle tension, back problems. Adoption stress, oh yes.
PS – I hope it doesn’t matter if I am White. I am a domestic American adoptee and do not have the same issues as adoptees for which this blog addresses. My ethnicity was not known to me. I was told my ethnic background when I was 18, which differed somewhat from what I was raised. Still, being told “German, Scottish, Swiss, French, Polish, English” is a shock when I was raised “English, Polish and Italian”. There is some question to Native American and Jewish ancestry, from what i was told in recent years, by several adoptive and natural family members. This should be interesting to research. The question of religion comes into play as well. Raised Catholic, protestant ancestry with Catholic, but could be Jewish. So, can I still comment here?!
ok people – HERE’S our (and Joan Wheeler’s) ethnic background: GERMAN. Maternal family – last name HERR (that’s GERMAN for “mister”). the Herr’s came to the United States in the 1700s. Some relatives claim they came over on the Mayflower, but that could be a case of urban legend. The Herrs settled in Lancaster County, Pennsylvania, and were Mennonites. Sometime in the 1800s they wanted to go west. So they set out in covered wagons. And got as far as Ohio. Some decided to return to Pennsylvania, but got as far as Western New York (Niagara Falls region/Buffalo). Somewhere along the way, they changed from Mennonite to Roman Catholic. A woman of Scottish descent married into our family (Margaret MacQuiston) she is my mother’s great grandmother. My mother’s mother Gertrude Stoll was pure German. Paternal side: paternal grandparents came to United States from GERMANY around the 1870′s. Last name Sippel. PURE GERMAN. Paternal grandmother’s mother and father came from POLAND – last name Wisnewski – PURE POLISH. So – my father was German/Polish. My mother was mostly German, with some Scottish, and supposedly the MacQuistons had some French and Welsh in them. And everybody was Roman Catholic.
Joan’s fixation on Native Americans is because when she was a kid, she watched them on TV and “fell in love with them.” THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NO NATIVE AMERICAN IN US AT ALL.
Jewish? I haven’t the slightest idea where this comes from.
Joan Wheeler is an asshole and that’s the dam truth.
Joan’s fixation on Native Americans resulted in her getting suede dresses, mocassins, beadwork as a child at Native souvenior stands around Niagara Falls and Crystal Beach, Ontario. By the time she was a teenager, she joined the Buffalo Indian Dance Group and learned many Native dances. She was in full Native dress when she performed with this group. This does NOT make her Native American any more than my study of Middle Eastern folk dances and a 15 year stint as a professional belly dancer makes me Arab. As a child, I too developed a love of a different ethnic culture – that of the Arab world. As a child, I watched such movies as Sinbad, and The Thief of Baghdad. One of my favorite books as a child was a children’s version of Alf Layla wa Layla – A Thousand and One Nights. I loved Ali Baba and the Forty Thieves and the story of Aladdin and the Magic Lamp and the djinn of the lamp. As a teenager, one of my favorite tv shows was I Dream of Jeannie. and I remember my father taking me to see the Ice Capades when I was 16 – and a couple of the dances were belly dance themed. I don’t remember when I first saw a live belly dance – but I saw many in the 1970′s when I was with my first husband, who was from Yemen. By 1980, I decided I wanted to learn the dance, and began taking lessons, and became a professional Middle Eastern dancer by 1985. Because of my marriage to an Arab man, I did learn some Arabic and made many friends in the local Arab community. This does NOT make me an “Arab” any more than Joan Wheeler’s love of Native American dance and art makes her American Indian. and by the way, Joan went out of her way to belittle me for my love of the Arabian culture in her libelous book. She is an ass.
Gert here…Joan wants a man to take care of her. She just lost a marriage to a Mexican/American Indian. She’s been sucking up to adoptee Daniel, who is of Arab descent. I propose that Daniel take Joan under his wings…take her to his home land, teach her all the things that she’s dying to know, and he can use her as his ‘boots on the ground’ in the USA. Oh but wait…Joan may NOT like that, cause she’s TOO independent…and she was AFRAID to be a exchange student in high school to go to Egypt cause THOSE people control their women!
And Daniel is sort-of smart. he knows that I have had a few comments with him in the past, politely disagreeing with him – and have not pestered him, nor sucked up to him. I say “sort-of” smart, because despite his obvious intelligence, he’s still been suckered in by Joan vampirism.
oh, we forgot how Miss Independent Joan – militant feminist in high school, was FORCED to dye her hair blonde when she was a bridesmaid for one of her adoptive cousins, during her freshmen year in college and then shortly afterwards, reconsidered going to Egypt because “they” control their women. — really? my first husband never controlled me. And he was one of “those people.” She’s not only an ass, but a bigot. But she picks and choses WHEN she’s a bigot. If someone of a different ethnicity than her can be of use to her, she’s a “lover” of the trans-racial thingy. Example: when she was gushing about her new romance, he was a Mexican/Native American. But after they broke up, she was trashing him on twitter and called him an “indian” – which is basically a slur.