abolishing adoption, adoption reform, being downright nasty, birth/adoptive families, birthmothers, browbeating people over adoption, call to arms, co-dependency, confrontations with Joan Wheeler, exploiting a dying dead mother, family honor, Forbidden Family a book of lies, Frank Ligvoet, freedom of speech and action., how not to be a social-worker, mental illness, mirah riben, wrong with your sisters
Oh, the shock of it all! Abolitionist of #adoption speaks with a bit of ‘boot licking’, brownie points and indignation! #flipthescript
Joan Wheeler is full of self-righteousness. She beats the drums of ‘named reformers’ hoping they will HELP her in her quest to ‘be just like them’!
BUT FIRST AN UPDATE…
UPDATE December 2016; as older posts are being seen I, Gert, am updating with links to my second blog and a Facebook page wherein I expose AGAIN the lies, fabrications and hate that Joan M Wheeler (Doris Michol Sippel) says about me and family. The first book ‘Forbidden Family, A Half Orphan’s Account of Her Adoption, Reunion and Social Activism‘ published in 2009, was pulled from publication by the publisher in May 2011 due to libelous material in it. Then in 2015, she ‘self-published’ a ‘revised’ version calling it ‘Forbidden Family, an adoptee duped by adoption’, being her own editor and owner. This woman has no shame no sense of family honor! Then in 2016 Joan changed her name back to her birth name and reedited and republished the SAME crap in another book; a Third edition! CALLED ‘Forbidden Family: An Adopted Woman’s Struggle for Identity’! Talk about conning people!
https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/ this blog’s title/sub title is… DUPED BY ADOPTION & AN WOMAN’S STRUGGLE FOR IDENTITY, A BOOK STUDY an in-depth analyzes of the books called Forbidden Family; My Life as an Adoptee Duped by adoption & An Adopted Woman’s Struggle for Identity by Joan M Wheeler/Doris M Sippel.
NOW BACK TO THIS POST….
I place my own comments, here, within and after Joan’s.
Joan M Wheeler · February 18, 2015 Joan says… It is shocking to see that Alison Caporimo’s article “17 Shocking Things Everyone Should Know About Adoption” has 290 comments while articles by adoption reformers Mirah Riben and Frank Ligvoet don’t seem to be attracting much by way of comments. I wonder if this is due to pre-adoptive and adoptive parents still living with their heads in the sand or if non-adopted people turn a blind eye because they have no interest or do not want to learn the truth.
Gert comments…Joan is always ‘wondering’, for you see, she just can’t take things on FACE VALUE, there MUST be some kind of agenda or stupidity on those that DO NOT see the issue, any issue, like Joan does! You know…Joan…perhaps people DON’T want to hear about YOUR TRUTH. Joan has lied so much in the past…and yes…we birth siblings HAVE exposed her lies…that people just may have turned a deaf ear to anything Joan Wheeler has to say. Or perhaps the simple truth is…that people will do what they want to do, without consulting Joan or other adoption reformers! Funny thing that ‘personal freedom’ thing! No question that adoption NEEDS reform, but, people like Joan Wheeler will NEVER convert anyone because of her unsavory tactics, deeds and lies.
Joan says… I certainly find it appalling that expectant mothers are referred to by adoption agency employees and prospective adoptive parents as “birthmothers”. It is shocking that mothers and fathers are not addressed as mothers and fathers. Mothers do not become “birthmothers” immediately after giving birth. They only become “birthmothers” when they sign away their parental rights. Like…wise, prospective adoptive parents are just that – prospective – and do not become adoptive parents until the adoption is finalized.
Gert comments…Joan is ALWAYS appalled and shocked! So what’s new? Joan is NEVER going to make EVERYONE think like she does. Joan is NOT an educator. Joan IS a browbeater.
Quoting Joan, she says… ‘They only become “birthmothers” when they sign away their parental rights.’ But in a recent comment, on another thread, where I stated how the adoption of my son went, Joan said that I am NOT a birthmother, when I clearly ‘signed away’ my rights in order to become his foster mother and then his adoptive mother (as the law states and works).
To which Joan said… None of this is true. None of it. Sue me for libel then. Sue me.
The entire discussion can be seen here… https://gertmcqueen.wordpress.com/2015/02/02/joanwheeler-just-cannot-handle-the-truth-she-actually-believes-her-own-bs-flipthescript/
But getting back to THIS thread, on this post…
Joan says… I find it shocking that many prospective adoptive mothers wear t-shirts that proclaim “Adoption is the new Pregnant” or that they are “Paper Pregnant”. This undermines the validity of pregnancy and is very disrespectful to pregnant women everywhere.
Gert comments…So says the great wizard of anti-adoption…Joan Wheeler! She really ought to develop a thicker skin. The world is full of people that have opinions and viewpoints that are opposite than one’s own and wear t-shirts with sayings that others FIND oppressive…it’s call FREEDOM OF EXPRESSION. Joan Wheeler is the thought/speech police of the adoption reform movement! She want to abolish adoption from the face of the globe. Good luck with that Joan!
Joan says… It is also shocking that people just do not care that every single adoptee loses their birth certificate at the finalization of adoption (except those adoptees living in Kansas and Alaska) and that a new, amended, birth certificate is created to replace it in every state in America, including Kansas and Alaska. People do not care that adoptees lose their identity in order to gain a home. People do not care that Registrars of Vital Statistics are committing government-sanctioned perjury each time they create a new birth certificate (and certify the facts on it as true) for a new adoptee. It is shocking that these laws were ever made into each state’s constitution. It is shocking that Registrars of Vital Statistics do not realize the grave injustice committed against otherwise free American citizens. It is also shocking that adoptees are not allowed to completely unseal their birth certificates. In the states that do allow adoptees access, adoptees are given uncertified copies of their sealed birth certificates. The falsified birth certificate in their adoptive name remains their legal birth certificate.
Gert comments…Yep it’s shocking! Each adoptee gets a new birth certificate. It’s shocking that people do not care about what Joan cares about…people don’t care what the Vital Statistics office does; are they REALLY committing a government sanctioned perjury? Regardless of one’s opinion, it’s the law and if you don’t like the law (think it’s outdated etc) then lobby the lawmakers and LEAVE PEOPLE ALONE to do what they wish to do in THEIR LIVES. My gods…let’s get RIGHT ON this…let’s MAKE SOMEONE RESPONSIBLE. It’s shocking, I tell you, shocking, that these grave injustices are COMMITTED against ‘otherwise’ free American citizens. It’s all just too SHOCKING! But then…Joan may have gotten a few brownie points from those ‘old reformers’, who’s club she wishes to belong to…problem is…Joan is too MUCH of a liability to them, on the larger stage. You see, Joan carries heavy dirty BAGGAGE. Remember, Joan Wheeler wrote a libelous book! That opened her up to FULL EXPOSURE. The birth family has been exposing all the dirty deeds and words that Joan has done. So where a few may give her some acknowledgement, the vast majority of CURRENT adoption reform WRITERS are NOT including Joan in their works.
It appears that on the Internet many are NOT soliciting her.
Mirah Riben author of the article quoted here. Joan Joan M Wheeler – Give it some time… should get some more comments… But your point is a true one. Most who adopt do not want to know the truth. They go into adoption like lovesick teenagers, not listening to friends or family who want them they are not making a good choice. Eyes glazed, they believe love will change everything and they want what they want.
Gert here again…No there were no more comments. That’s right Mirah, Joan need to give it time…like perhaps after she’s gone and another generation comes of age BEFORE certain changes CAN be made. The problem with Joan is…she doesn’t want just CHANGE, she wants ABOLISHMENT! That and Joan’s insistence on browbeating, insulting etc along with her past deeds to FAMILY are WHAT IS holding the current adoption reform movement at a standstill. Some changes can only happen when the field is cleared of certain obstacles like Joan Wheeler.
Ruth March 14, 2015
I am absolutely SHOCKED – that an “accomplished writer” (yeah right) – like Joan can’t think of any other adjectives! It’s shocking, I tell you – simply SHOCKING.